It's not really surprising that Yoshi has become one of Nintendo's most worthy mascots. His skills merit nothing less. Admittedly, some would think that Yoshi's disturbing lack of vocabulary is a disadvantage. But let's be serious here. It's not like 'It'sa me!' Mario has anything more inventive to say. And unlike Mario, Yoshi isn't constantly being manipulated by some Princess who invariably gets kidnapped and moved between different sinister castles. Besides, conversation is nothing next to the power of eating people and turning them into eggs. There aren't many people who can stand up to this sort of ability! And that's not all. Yoshi is also an incredible driver. At first glance, you might be dubious about that statement. After all, he appears to be a prehistoric dinosaur with no knowledge of technology, very short arms and a penchant for eating things. Despite all this, I assure you that Yoshi's driving abilities are unmatched. He can add insane acceleration to any vehicle he's in. I don't know why. But he can. And when he wins a race, you know the line that he always uses. Anyone who has played Mariokart should be familiar with the sound Yoshi makes as he races past them to the finish line. I am also impressed by Yoshi's footware. His kind seem to have no use for clothing, aside from the occaisonal saddle. And yet Yoshi is never seen without his stylish red shoes. That's a big step above your average dinosaur.
Like many celebrities, Yoshi is a focal point for controversy. I should mention that there is disagreement about the noise that he constantly makes. It's true that it can sometimes be difficult to interpret, usually when the stupid Ape is shouting something at the same time. Whatever the reason, certain annonymous people claim that Yoshi makes a sound somewhat reminiscent of FWIPOW! I just can't agree with that. There's no POW in WEEPBONG! Clearly, this is a very important diagreement that must be resolved. The exact nature of the sound that Yoshi makes is a critical issue that affects us all. Though every sound is open to interpretation, I think that getting FWIPOW from WEEPBONG is way too much of a creative stretch. FWIPOW might be the noise made by Boshi, the evil bizarro Yoshi, but it's simply no match for the Real Thing. Much like President's Choice Cola and my corporate sponsor, Coca-Cola. It's not even close.
Words can't fully convey the meaning of this quote. That's because it was never meant to be translated into writing, and it was only with great difficulty and years of study that I was able to hack out a spelling that almost approximates the sound of the word. Even so, it doesn't really do justice to one of the greatest tag-lines of our times. You really have to hear it for yourself to fully comprehend the perfection of the sound. This isn't hard to do; the sound is featured in about a dozen Nintendo games, ready for your listening pleasure. For those few who might not have figured it out yet, this quote comes directly from Yoshi, the green dinosaur featured in a plethora of Mario games. It's a sad fact that many of the Mario characters are overshadowed by the lead character, including most notably Luigi. Some might initially have feared that Yoshi would end up the same way, as just another kind of mushroom that would make Mario's prestige grow bigger. Instead, Yoshi has blazed a trail to his own success. He's become the star of his own games, such as Yoshi's Island. How does Yoshi respond to his success? The same way he responds to everything. WEEPBONG!
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