It's hip to be square!

This quote may be a bit outdated. In fact, it hasn't been hip to be a square for quite some time. Since the 80s, I believe. Coincidently enough, that time period is the focus of this quote. And if the picture above doesn't tell you, I'll clue you into the fact that this rant is gonna be about the cartoons of that era. You see, I believe that the '80s were the golden ages of animation. Of course, I don't mean that in terms of the frame rate or the skills of the artists involved. I'm just saying that shows back then seemed to be much more entertaining, and more importantly, amusing. As such, I believe they've had the most success of any cartoons (if you'll excuse my legaleese). Some might be aware that this is not the first time I've dwelt on this topic. In fact, I've covered it on many occaisons, including my tribute to Transformers, my analysis of Thundercats, my rambling about Inspector Gadget and many others. You might think I've talked this one to death, but I assure you that this topic is still alive and breathing, and like some of these great series, I intend to continue repeating myself until I'm taken off-line.
I'm not sure what made most '80s cartoon designers so brillant. But there's little doubt that they were. After all, it takes pure genius to craft a cartoon around Mr. T without distracting the audience with the other members of the A-Team. The designers did take certain creative liberties while doing so, such as teaming T with a group of olympic gymnasts. I'm not sure where they got that idea, but it does give Mr. T lots of opportunities to save the wussy gymnasts while handing out ponderous moral lessons. That's something that's really missing from today's animated series. Kids can no longer count on their favorite cartoon heroes to give them advice on how to live their lives. Personally, I don't know how kids these days make it through their childhoods without the likes of Mr. T and Fisto to guide them. People say you learn everything you need to know about life from Kindergarten. I disagree. I picked it all up from He-Man. I'm talking about the old series here, not the new fangled updated version that dared to change Skeletor's patented shrill voice.
While it was once hip to be a square, it was never hip to be a cube. If only the makers of the Rubik's Cube had remembered this before allowing their puzzle to become the squeeky protagonist of an animated series. In all fairness, I have to mention that like all points in history, the 80s did have its fair share of bad ideas. And the Rubik's Cube cartoon was one of them. I've tried to purge my memory of all these disasters, and I've partially succeeded. Still, it's important to note that the bad always comes with the good, and that for every Mr. T cartoon there was also a Turbo Teen. Which I'm told was pretty bad. It's one of the ones I've blocked from my memory, but I suspect it might someday come back in a series of traumatic Vietnam-style flashbacks. Despite what he claimed, I'm not sure I would be able call Fisto to help me deal with those.
As a final disclaimer, I should note that I'm not totally against the cartoons of today. There are a few worth watching, but they are limited to the likes of Johnny Bravo. Even the networks seem to have noticed how popular the retro series from the '80s are. I wish they would simply air them again instead of remaking and inevitably ruining them. Except for Rubik's Cube. I hope that stays in the trashbin of history where it belongs.
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