Unfortunately, Talk Like a Pirate Day is one of the holidays that doesn't involve an exemption from school/work. Which is a shame, really. Since we're emulating pirates anyway, I think we should be out there looting and pillaging at random. And drawing inaccurate treasure maps. Because even pirates had to think about the future, and burying treasure was their only method of financial planning. I know that some provinces have holidays like Oil Day, wherein they get a vacation due to the fact that they have oil. This is a much more flimsy excuse than the need to imitate pirates. But regardless, the place I work at seemed to take Talk Like a Pirate Day quite seriously. Which, of course, could be nothing less than hillarious. The emails were flying fast and furious, filled with pirate cliches and aliases. It seemed that everyone was in the proper spirit, ready for some loot and pundering. Yes, this quote is no typo; Talk Like a Pirate Day made a perfect excuse to let loose puns of all sorts. And as some might be aware, I like puns almost as much as I like pirates.
This view is not universally shared by all of humankind. Believe it or not, there is a small but vocal minority that do not like puning. In fact, some have even called it one of the lowest forms of humour, next to slapstick. I think it goes without saying that this statement is completely false. In fact, I believe that anyone making such a statement needs to be punished. And the best way to do that is to put them in the punalty box. I'd better stop now before I alienate even more readers. Some pundits probably think I've already gone too far...
As a parting statement, I have to mention one of the best emails sent around during Talk Like a Pirate Day. The sender used the lingo appropriate for most modern day pirates, the ones who steal software rather than gold. And his haX0r message was very funny indeed. Brimming with the crazy abreviations favored by those unable to type properly, it began with a great greeting: Yo my peeps, what's whack? It's almost like a different language entirely. And with that, me mateys, I'll be setting sail for the open seas, in search of another ship of software to plunder. Like a Windows XP vessel, I've heard they're easy to board, although they do present the danger of crashing at any moment. Probably on the blue shores of death. ARR!
My favorite holiday of the year is not Christmas. Nor is it any of the other Christmas equivalents celebrated by different religions. Everyone may be Irish on St. Patrick's day, but some of us don't really want to be Irish. Especially if it means that we have to put up with some blarney. Halloween is anoter great event, but it takes quite a bit of preparation. Not like the subject of this quote, which was only recently created and requires almost no preparation at all. Yes, I am referring to International Talk Like a Pirate Day! Unlike most other holidays, Talk Like a Pirate Day is not all based on anything historic, aside from the lingo we all assume was used by pirates back in their heyday. It's really nothing more than a great excuse to talk about making people walk the plank and threaten to keel-haul them. There aren't many days where you can get away with these sorts of lines without facing consequences that may involve scurvy government troopers. That alone makes this one of my favorite holidays.
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