As I mentioned above, my character was a politician. His name was Tortzelli, and he knew judo. This was one of his major policies, and merely demonstrates the fact that he had no real platform. He was seeking election to the Electran senate, and his publicity was all over the place. He had also hired a very competent team to help him avoid having to make any sort of decision himself. Some members of his team included Jason Moscovitz, Brooke Dobney (a consulting god) and Coolio, who knew what was 'hip' these days. Even with this qualified team, polls indicated that Tortzelli would have been more popular if he were dead. His only hope was to become a Super-Hero. This was the only way he could attract the popular vote that he needed to win the election. Several commercials featured him saving animals from trees or helping old ladies cross the street. A few of these commercials even showed him defeating a mugger armed with a brick. Of course, these commercials were actually all merely showing different angles of the same event. And the robber wasn't really armed with a brick; Tortzelli just added that in afterwards to make his opponent seem more dangerous. Tortzelli had many slogans which were used on his posters. I will provide a list of some of them below.
He can't fly, but neither can you!
Don't care about politics? Tortzelli: He'll reduce crime...personally!
Tortzelli has saved the empire from evil robots. You wouldn't elect an evil robot to the senate, so why vote for anyone other than Tortzelli?
Tortzelli: He looks like a million bucks.This quote was used at a fairly recent roleplaying adventure to describe a decidedly suspicious situation. In order to truly grasp this quote, you need to understand two things. The first is the Shawinigate 'scandal' that filled the news up here in Canada a year ago. It involved Shawinigan, the riding of Jean Chretien, and some alleged complex pay-back scheme involving a golf course and a poorly-managed hotel. By commenting that this hotel was in the prime minister's riding, the opposition hoped to create some sort of scandal. They likely figured that if they gave it a snappy name reminiscent of 'Watergate' it would be better believed by the public. Thus, Shawinigate was born. The second thing that needs to be explained is Shiwan Khan. If you've read the quote from two weeks ago, then you'll understand who I'm talking about. If not, this is the perfect chance to read the story. This quote was spoken by my character, who was a politician currently on an election campaign. He had heard of the Shawinigate scandal, and had also met Shiwan Khan. Two characters were arguing over who allowed Shiwan Khan to enter their school of psychics. His entrance was a big disgrace based on the fact that Shiwan though he could control everyone's mind, while actually having no psi powers. My character was quick to denote this scandal as 'Shiwanigate', and it was about as serious as the real Shawinigate scandal. Probably more so, actually. Shiwan was a super-villain, after all.
Then vote for Tortzelli because he knows JUDO!
He can save the economy too.
He's worth at least your vote.
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