You're probably wondering where this sudden yet likely fleeting fascination with appliances came from. Well, my girlfriend's family recently purchased a new dishwasher. And not just any dishwasher. This one is obviously a product of our latest technology (or so they claim), and comes with its own DVD full of instructions (where the above assertions are made). I am somewhat baffled by the claims of Kitchenaid that their product is intuitive and easy to use, given that they feel the need to send you a whole DVD full of instructions. Considering that most people don't even bother reading written instructions, I'm quite amused by the idea that customers are expected to pop in a DVD for an evening tutorial on their dishwasher. What kind of exciting material would they include to justify the cost of producing a DVD? Obviously, I had to watch it to find out.
In addition to the aforementioned instructions, the Kitchenaid DVD also included several advertisements for the dishwasher that had just been bought, rhapsodizing about the joys of doing dishes - quietly. Exciting! Nothing says good times like silence. The DVD called this section Lifestyle Changes, which amused me immeasurably. Suddenly, they're pushing the idea that your lifestyle will change around the purchase of your new dishwasher. Our kitchens are on the cusp of a whole new era, and all you need to cross that threshold is the assistance of Kitchenaid! In fact, they couch it like this dishwasher will be the center of your life for years to come, perhaps the proverbial hearth of the 21st century. It's like a new member of the family! You've got to cater to its needs! (And the DVD also mentions that it's even a top choice among caterers! With material like this, I don't even need to make anything up.) You've just got to change your lifestyle in order to make this new family member feel welcome.
Watching the DVD only confirmed my hypothesis regarding its hilarity. The Lifestyles section shows several families who have become totally addicted to the quiet, deep tray, ultra-heating power of their dishwasher. In fact, the success of their party/fishing trip/golf game/catering business seems to rest solely on the might of Kitchenaid. Apparently, Kitchenaid feels they must cater to these four demographics, which obviously make up the population of the world. In all cases, it seems to fall up to one guy to do all the dishes, as is only appropriate in our politically correct advertising climate. And it seems like his lifestyle has changed such that he is constantly doing dishes. People walk up to him and just hand him dirty cutlery non-stop, and he is expected to wash it all. What a chump! He has become a slave to his own dishwasher! This hardly sounds like the lifestyle I'd like to adopt, but the commercial is meant to make it look like operating the dishwasher and its buttons is totally fun. Trust me; it's not. The only fun lies in mocking the video itself.
At the end of the day, I'd have to rate the DVD as sad, but amusing. Kind of like the last election 'round these parts. And that's all the dish I can give you on this topic.
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