"In the red corner, weighing in at a pot-bellied 262 pounds, and topping an impressive height of 6'3, more if he actually had hair, the cold, the STONE Cold Steve Austin! Now you'd all better clap, 'cuz HE said so!"
"And now, in the other corner, the challenger. He weighs in at an incredibly fit 243 pounds and also hits a height of 6'3, more if you count his mohawk. He's been called helluva tough, and The Big Bad Crate Of Badassness. I present Mr. T!!!..or, umm..should I say Clubber Lang?!"
As the two fighters enter the ring, Stone Cold quickly gives Mr. T the finger, somehow hoping that will defeat him. Mr. T only looks angered, and says, "I pity da foo' who thinks his finger can stop me!"
Stone Cold Steve Austin sneers, and gives him the finger once more. "Shut up, jackass!" he says in his deep, gruff, voice.
Mr. T steps forward, quickly putting on his boxing gloves from Rocky III, and growls, "Maybe with these on, I won't kill you in a single punch, Suckah!"
Stone Cold's face turns red with anger, and as he leaps forward, he shouts, "That's it, jackass! I'm gonna do my STONE COLD STUNNER on you!" Mr. T watches impatiently as Steve Austin flails around blindly with his arms, to no effect whatsoever. Apparently finished the 'move', Austin straightens. Squinting, he seems shocked that Mr. T is still standing.
"Was that your crazy move, foo'?" Mr. T asks with contempt. Austin's eyes widen, and he shouts, "You should be KO'ed, 'CAUSE STONE COLD SAID SO!" His eyes widen even more, though, when Mr. T doesn't keel over instantly 'cuz he said so. "That's it, foo'!" shouts T, "I'm gonna throw your ass!"
Still staring incredulously at Mr. T, Austin makes one last attempt to defend himself by giving his opponent the finger once more. It doesn't work. Austin is flung out of the ring, and probably all the way to Brazil, whilst Mr. T receives yet another gold medal.
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