Adventure Overview
Players: Morton, Faust and Jazz.
Enemies: Diablo, his undead minions and several fictional enemies.
Started: With a Deep Space tradition and work reports.
Ended: As Morton fled from Muradin's anger.
In order to finally restore order to Sector Y, Zaya believed it would be necessary to send a team down to the surface of this asteroid. Though such a mission would be dangerous, she had already convinced Jean-Luc Picard to seek Starfleet's approval. Once it came, they would act immediately. Of course, Picard was quick to point out that bureaucracy takes time, and that they might not hear back from Starfleet for up to four to six weeks. All the same, Zaya felt they should be prepared. Jazz didn't like the notion of any such combat, noting that he was all about peace, man. On the other hand, Faust thought that some of the space monsters might make great additions to his morgue. And Morton offered to help kill them from the comfort of his ship, which would thus increase his kill count and rating. On the topic of ships, Zaya had to inquire if the new Falcon-X missiles courtesy of The Broker had arrived. Morton angrily replied that they had been brought by a man called the Transporter, and that they were all duds. Unfortunately, the Broker had already left the station, and considering how difficult he was to catch, securing a refund from him would not be easy. It was no big deal, according to Jazz, who declared that missiles were over-rated. Still, Jean-Luc Picard disapproved of any misuse of station resources, and since they had paid for the missiles, he believed they should certainly receive them. For once, Morton agreed with the station's number two. He offered to arrange a meeting with The Transporter by claiming that he had some things that needed to be delivered. They could then jump him upon his arrival and claim the missiles they'd already paid for. Now that this matter was settled, Zaya had just one more question for the three protagonists. When searching Virgil's corpse, they had discovered some sort of remote control, covered with several glowing buttons. No one was quite sure what it would operate, though Vance offered to find out. Only Jazz offered a faster way to discover what the controls did, but Vance insisted that careful study should be done before any of the buttons were pressed. Leaving the matter in the capable hands of her science officer, Zaya declared the meeting at an end and dismissed them.
Morton wasted no time in heading down towards the lower levels, looking for either the Sunstone or Muradin Bronzebeard. Jazz, on the other hand, had no real intention of leaving. But strangely enough, Zaya didn't seem to want his company. He could only assume this was due to her fear that his presence might attract the attention of Johnny, The Man. Not wanting to inflict that sort of punishment on her, Jazz decided instead to pay a little visit down to security. He knew Elizabeth Bathory was being held there, and figured it would be a good time to go hit on her. Upon entering security, he found Blank propped up in his usual chair, with a pair of Red-Shirts standing nearby. Jazz's typical greeting gestures were enough to drop one of the two Red-Shirts, and the other one looked to barely be alive. For his part, Blank blandly suggested Jazz give up his whole pointing thing around the Red-Shirts. This only led Jazz to point at him as if he'd suggested a great idea, thus killing the other Red-Shirt. Ignoring that, Jazz stated his intention to visit Bathory, noting that Blank had likely only arrested her in the first place to keep her to himself. Blank reminded him that Bathory had been trying to bite Morton's neck, but Jazz claimed that was only self-defense, and that Morton should be the one in the brig. Not bothering to refute Jazz's claim, Blank only reminded him that he couldn't let Bathory out of her cell, no matter what she offered. Hardly listening, Jazz slid down the row of cells, drawing heckles from most of the angry prisoners. But he was right where he wanted to be: the center of attention.
By this point, Morton had reached the lowest level of the station, and had decided to continue his search for the Sunstone. This led him to the engineering bay, where he encountered Jordi LaForge. The station's new engineer was busy flailing about the room, apparently having lost his sight-granting visor. Spotting it on a nearby counter, Morton hastily gave it to him before LaForge could cause any damage to the station's systems. Jordi accepted his visor with obvious gratitude, and offered in return to share his knowledge on crystals. Having worked on a crusier for many years, LaForge knew that large amounts of crystals were required to keep the ship's engines running. He could only assume that Morton's ship would also enjoy increased speed if it was powered by one of these crystals. Of course, Jordi had to note that they were often difficult and dangerous to obtain. Giving yet another different description of the Sunstone, Morton asked Jordi if he'd ever heard of it. To the pilot's disappointment, LaForge was forced to admit that he'd never actually heard of the Sunstone. But he agreed that the name implied that large amounts of energy could be harvested from the Sunstone, making it a worthy crystal indeed.
Faust and Gulstamp were also on the lowest level of the station, though they had both ventured once more into the darkness that was the boiler room. Faust had decided that stakes would surely be effective weapons against Dracula, and started searching the room for wood. With a vast misinterpretation of Faust's plans, Gulstamp also searched the room, but his goal was to find some steak. He assumed it would be used as bait for any vampires nearby, since they clearly would be unable to resist the bloody meat. After all, who could turn away steaks grilled over an open boiler? (/subliminal beef advertisement) Frankenstein certainly enjoyed them, eating with about as much enthusiasm as a dead dog could muster. For his part, Faust had located a wooden board, and started to care it very ineffectively into stakes with his battle-scythe. He had just finished crafting his second stake when he heard something tapping on the boiler room. Gulstamp quickly got his mirror and potato breath ready, while Faust crept over to the door and threw it open. At first, he saw only an empty hallway. Then, glancing down, he noticed a zombie armadillo, making the distinctive but undescribed noise that is favored by undead armadillos everywhere. There was a note pinned to the armadilo's rotting nose, containing flowing script. It invited Faust to come and visit the ship known as the Second Edition, and it was signed by Diablo, one of the most infamous necromancers of the galaxy, and one of the inventors of Dungeons & Dragons, Spherus' most dangerous passtime.
Faust was shocked that Diablo would come to the station, but even more surprised that he would bother animating an armadillo. Gulstamp declared this a bad omen, and noted that anyone capable of making pacts with the dead had to be stopped. Looking evasive for a moment, Faust suggested they go look for Diablo's ship. It didn't take them long to find it. The Second Edition was a large transport ship, shaped rather like a twenty-sided die. It was too big to actually fit inside the docking bay, so a boarding tunnel had been extended into space bay one. Upon entering this corridor, the two felt like they were walking directly down into a fiery abyss. This was probably due to the incredible heat being pumped into the tunnel, as well as the flickering flames painted along the sides. The end of the boarding tunnel was blocked by a door, which didn't open as the two approached. A video screen on the door showed continuous footage of a flaming demonic face, that looked rather like the Diablo computer game logo.
Once the two had stopped before the door, the screen lit up to show the masked face of Diablo himself. A speaker in the upper corner of the passage projecting his gloating voice throughout the tunnel. With an evil laugh, Diablo welcome Faust, and noted that he would be observed by the powers of a secret camera. Furthermore, Diablo stipulated that Faust would give him the Book of the Dead. Faust was obviously reluctant to do so, though Gulstamp muttered that no harm had ever come from reading a book. Regardless, Diablo had something further to encourage Faust's cooperation. The picture on the screen suddenly shifted to show a familiar woman tied to a slab, with the crimson form of Diablo leaning over her. It was Commander Zaya. Diablo claimed to have kidnapped her, and would certainly kill her if Faust did not agree with his demands. Faced with these alternatives, Faust declared he would have to go get the book, since he didn't carry it on him. Before he could leave, Diablo set down one final condition. He didn't intend to simply hand over Zaya. As the proverbial maiden in distress, he declared that they would have to master the madness of his dark game before any exchange could be made. As such, Diablo ordered Faust to bring back two more impressionable youths, who would be forced to delve deep into Diablo's Dark World of Dungeons & Dragons. Faust agreed to this proposition. He already knew which two people to look for.
Of course, Faust had no real intention of giving Diablo the Book of the Dead, but he knew that he would need something that looked at least a bit similar to fool his dark nemesis. As such, he and Gulstamp went down to the boiler room to put together their own Book of the Dead. This was accomplished by tearing all the pages pretaining to undead from the Monstrous Manual. Faust then stapled together, and for good measure, slathered the whole thing in blood from the steaks Gulstamp had been cooking. With all this done, it did look a bit like a satanic tome. And smelled like steak, but that was only a side effect. With this book ready, the two went looking for the other impressionable youths requested by Diablo. They found Morton scouring the lowest level of the station. He was more than willing to help them, especially given the possibility that Diablo might have the Sunstone. Morton also knew where to find Jazz. If he wasn't with Zaya, he was almost certainly in the brig, chatting with Elizabeth Bathory. They found him doing just that. When told that Zaya was in danger, Jazz replied that he would do whatever was necessary to save her. And in so doing, he speculated that he might earn her gratitude. Of course, Blank considered this a major security issue, and was willing to mobilise all the Red-Shirts at his command. Faust didn't think this was a good idea; the weak-minded Red-Shirts would easily fall prey to the madness that was Diablo's game. Besides, such a bold attack might endanger the Commander, if Diablo wasn't bluffing on that point. Blank decided to make sure by checking the security camera footage. Jazz was disappointed to see that there wasn't actually a camera in Zaya's room. But there was one right outside the door, and it showed disturbing footage of Diablo exiting the room with Zaya slung over one shoulder, laughing all the while. It wasn't clear how he could have slipped past security, but there seemed to be no doubt that he had Commander Zaya. And to free her, they would need to enter his world.
By the time the four got back down to Diablo's Second Edition, Muradin Bronzebeard was already there. He had determined that the Sunstone must be providing power to Diablo's large ship, and vowed to get it, even if it meant dipping into the occult. Now five, the party walked down the tunnel to the door. Diablo's floating head appeared once again on the screen attached to the door. As flames burned behind him, he gave his introduction with a laugh. This involved asked if they were feeling brave tonight. But how brave? Were they brave enough to overcome great danger? To sneak through a dark fortress, with the possibility of facing a Dragonstrike? Gulstamp found this introduction more than a bit ominous, and started praying in several different accents while flipping through the many different religious symbols hanging around his neck. Faust asked him if this was actually effective. Gulstamp wasn't really sure, but he thought that if you happened to have the right symbol, it was supposed to scare away evil spirits. Keeping this in mind, Faust borrowed one of these crosses for his own personal use. By this time, Diablo had opened the door to his ship, and the five stepped inside. The door closed right on their heels. They found themselves in a dark room, illuminated by strange hanging lamps on the walls. There were two doors leading from the room, though both were closed at the moment. A screen hung on one of the walls, showing the idling Diablo symbol. There was also a table with several sets of dice and character sheets. Before these could be further investigated, the face of El Diablo appeared once more on the screen. He declared that the first step would be for them to each take a set of dice. They would become their constant companions, and almost inseparable. In fact, Diablo noted that many players tend to build dice tower monuments that could become almost sacred. Muttering angrily about their odd shapes, Muradin grabbed a set of dice. Gulstamp did the same. There remained three sets: purple dice, a clear set and one colored like spotted blue rock, that some might claim were difficult to read. Faust grabbed the purples ones, while Jazz got the blue ones. This left Morton with the clear dice.
These clear, purple dice seem to roll very high, regardless of the situation. As such, they get a +4 to any actual roles on the dice, though this cannot exceed the dice's natural maximum. Any resemblance they bear to real dice is strictly coincidental.
Some might claim that this set of blue stone-tinged dice is hard to read, but that's fine as far as you're concerned. This means the dice always seem to 'roll' the number that you want - provided you aren't challenged by either the GM or another player, who can identify the actual role with a successful x1 Int check.
These dice appear to be cursed. While this may be effective in situations requiring checks, it's still generally bad to roll low all the time. This results in a -2 to all dice rolls, though it should not noted that this cannot make a dice's roll go below the normal minimum for that dice.
What is this sissy stuff? You've heard it's only for geeks, but then again, if someone like Vin Diesel plays Dungeons & Dragons, you know that it must somehow be a manly thing to do. Hopefully you'll get to kill lots of things, 'cause that would be cool.
Available points: 100
You must assign these points to the stats below, paying careful attention that none of these stats exceed the maximum score listed next to them. Each available point placed into your sanity raises it by 1, whereas a single point in either roleplaying or metagaming will raise that statistic by 2.
Sanity: (Maximum: 40) 40
Special Power: Player's Edit - Through sheer anger and heavy use of his fear factor, Morton can contradict the events laid out by the GM and edit them to fit into his favor. Though this power cannot be used to insert new elements into the adventure, it can be used to alter circumstances put forth by the GM and warp them in Morton's favor. Can only be used once per adventure.
Roleplaying: (Maximum: 60) 50
Metagaming: (Maximum: 80) 70
It seems that you have no choice but to dip into the Diablo's dark world of Dungeons & Dragons. You're fully aware of how dangerous this is, especially given the addictive nature of this evil roleplaying. Still, with your knowledge of the rulebooks, you're sure that you can deal with anything Diablo throws against you.
Available points: 100
You must assign these points to the stats below, paying careful attention that none of these stats exceed the maximum score listed next to them. Each available point placed into your sanity raises it by 1, whereas a single point in either roleplaying or metagaming will raise that statistic by 2.
Sanity: (Maximum: 20) 13
Special Power: Rules Lawyer - With his actual knowledge of the D&D gamesystem, gained through perusal of the Monstrous Manual and the Necromancer's Handbook, Faust can come up with obscure and often fictional rules which allow him to alter any one dice roll by any modifier that he sees fit. Can only be used once per adventure.
Roleplaying: (Maximum: 90) 89
Metagaming: (Maximum: 85) 80
Aow! You don't know what this whole roleplaying thing is all about, and you're not sure that it's cool. Many 'gamers' who you met at University were anything but hip. Still, in the name of saving the damsel in distress, you're willing to put up with a bit of this roleplaying stuff, and you intend to look good while doing it.
Available points: 100
You must assign these points to the stats below, paying careful attention that none of these stats exceed the maximum score listed next to them. Each available point placed into your sanity raises it by 1, whereas a single point in either roleplaying or metagaming will raise that statistic by 2.
Sanity: (Maximum: 30) 30
Special Power: Humorous Interruption - By using this move, Jazz interrupts the GM's carefully prepared and usually serious script with humorous remarks. The content of these remarks vary, though they often involve getting drinks or something like that. This lessens the obvious strain of roleplaying, causing the results of the next check to restore sanity as opposed to reducing it. Can only be used once per adventure.
Now that everyone had claimed their own set of dice, Diablo declared that it was time to choose their characters. Gulstamp had nou doubts; he knew the character he wanted, and shouted that he would take the Wizard. Diablo replied with sharply that he was on, whatever that meant. Muradin Bronzebeard, on the other hand, wasn't so sure about this whole role-playing thing. He wanted to sit out for the first part and just watch the others in an attempt to get the hang of it. This seemed to anger Diablo, who declared that he didn't need to get the 'hang' of anything. In that case, Muradin grumbled that he should probably be the Dwarf. His grumpiness only increased when El Diablo informed him that there was no dwarf in this adventure. He would have to be the sissy Elven enchantress. With a scream of rage, Muradin declared that he would rather die than be a woman. He retracted that statement moments later, likely realising that Diablo would probably have been willing to take him up on that offer. This left three characters for Faust, Jazz and Morton. They included The Warrior, The Thief, and Greenthorn the Elf. Jazz thought this Greenthorn guy sounded hip, mainly because he had a name. Morton was obviously prone to the Warrior, since the two had a lot in common. Like being big and fighting machines. Having no other choice, Faust agreed to play The Thief.
Roleplaying: (Maximum: 75) 70
Metagaming: (Maximum: 75) 70
Strength: 17
Dexterity: 8
Constitution: 16
HP: (5d10+10)
Thac0: 14
AC: 4
Two-Handed Sword (Damage: 1d12, Speed: 8) +2 Hit, +3 Damage
Special Notes: You are The Warrior, who is so good that he doesn't even get a name. While physically powerful, you're also lacking in the coordination department, and tend to be big, stupid and clumsy. Still, you're incredibly brave, and willing to face any danger that will allow you to impress people and get some treasure in the process.
Strength: 13
Dexterity: 16
Constitution: 10
HP: (3d12+6)
Thac0: 16
AC: 6
Short Sword (Damage: 1d6, Speed: 4) +1 Hit, +2 Damage
Long Bow (Damage: 1d8, Speed: 6) +2 Hit
Special Notes: As Greenthorn the Elf, you seem to be one of the few characters in Diablo's dark game with an actual name that isn't merely your class. You also have the knowledge of Elven Lore, which allows you to preach at people about nature and stuff. It's really quite useless, though you would never admit that. Finally, it should be noted that although your character sheet says that you have blue eyes, you've actually decided that they should be gray instead.
Strength: 9
Dexterity: 17
Constitution: 12
HP: (4d6+5)
Thac0: 17
AC: 2
Daggers (Damage: 1d4, Speed: 3) +1 Hit, +1 Damage, -1 to Speed.
Special Notes: As The Thief, you consider yourself to be both sneaky and cunning. And you really consider The Warrior to be a detriment to your team. He's big and clumsy, and likely to get you all killed in the first encounter with enemies. He also seems to be think that the only thing you're good for is picking locks. Personally, you think shoving his head through a door is a more effective way of opening it. Hopefully, you'll get a chance to demonstrate that point.
Now that everyone had their characters, they were ready to enter Diablo's Dark World of Dungeons & Dragons. Before doing so, Morton reminded Diablo that they would have to make it a quick session. Diablo snarled that he was well aware of the fact that Morton had to work the next day, and would shorten the adventure appropriately. Meanwhile, they were expected to roll their hitpoints. Morton was very disappointed by the roll obtained with his cursed clear dice. So disappointed, in fact, that he decided to roll again. Diablo declared that rerolling was not allowed, but Morton used his belligerence and special power to do it anyway. His second role was much more favorable. Jazz, of course, got just the role he wanted. With that done, Diablo invited them to enter the first gaming room. One of the doors slide open, allowing the five to proceed into a room much like the one they had just left. It had another gaming table, with Diablo's screen looming over it. There was also a small kitchen area, though none had the will to check it out when faced with Diablo's command to seat themselves at the table.b The adventure began in a dark dungeon, featuring Gulstamp, Sorceror of Light. Jazz and Morton both demanded to know if they were there, eliciting an angry response from Diablo, who declared that they were at a bar getting drunk. Jazz subsequently asked if there were any women in the bar, but Diablo ignored him and instead set the scene. Gulstamp had just entered a door to the north, and was now by himself. The stench of mildew eminated from the wet dungeon walls.
At this point, Diablo's commentary was interrupted by shouts from Muradin Bronzebeard, who had mustered the will to investigate the kitchen area. He was wondering where the cheetos were. Once Diablo explained that they were on a shelf right nearby, Muradin then asked who wanted a Mountain Dew. All three protagonists accepted, though both Jazz and Faust made the metagaming check necessary to realise that this was a Pepsi product, and could thus not be beneficial. As the two poured their cans on their character sheets, as was dictated for a proper form of initiation, Morton chugged down his Mountain Dew, and lost massive sanity upon discovering its true nature the hard way.
Returning to the game at hand, Diablo declared that there was suddenly an elf behind Gulstamp. It was Greenthorn the Elf. He was a wearing a gray cloak, and a brown tunic and had blue eyes. Jazz spoke up at this point, declaring that he had gray eyes, not blue. Diablo demanded to verify this on his sheet. Jazz was forced to admit that his sheet did say that he had blue eyes, but now he wanted gray instead. Diablo decided that this didn't matter, and told the two they could now talk to each other. With an extreme lack of proper role-playing, Greenthorn used Jazz's traditional greeting, including pointing and saying 'Hey!'. Gulstamp, meanwhile, introduced himself as Gulstamp, Sorceror of Light. However, these words had barely passed from his mouth when Diablo suddenly declared that they were surrounded by eight ogres. No one was sure how this could have happened, but since no one had actually said they had cast a spell to prevent it, Diablo insisted that there were now ogres. Greenthorn and Gulstamp had no choice but to do battle. Fortunately, Greenthorn seemed to roll maximum damage every single time, though this was sometimes questioned by Diablo, though only on occaisons where Jazz did actually roll high, coincidently enough. Gulstamp meanwhile, could apparently cast all the first level spells. After doing a few magic missiles, he decided to clean things with a fireball. Diablo warned that this might hit his friend, but Gulstamp figured this was fine. He hadn't known him that long anyway. When the smoke cleared, a battered Greenthorn stood among the beaten ogres. The conflict was over, and the two were to able to exit the dungeon without further incident. And with a fair amount of treasure as well.
At this point, the door in the gaming room slid open, and Diablo invited them to proceed to the next chamber. Morton quickly disputed whether this would be known as a different session, since they were now switching rooms. Diablo ominously declared that it was still the same session, so long as it was being played on the same occaison. A short debate ensued on this topic, and by the time it concluded, the five were seated at another table. This room didn't have a kitchen, but it did have two doors leading onwards, both currently closed. As Diablo set the next scene, Jazz used several humorous interruptions, including asking for a Coke in the middle of Diablo's speech and demanding to know the length of a moose's nose. This allowed the players to restore the sanity they would have lost from the ensuing role-playing check, which turned out to be a very good thing for Jazz, whose skills in this department seemed to be lacking. Regardless, all five fictional characters were now in the local King's court, enjoying a large celebration. The room was filled with courtiers, musicians and a scottish cleric. There was also one important NPC. Diablo declared that this character would be controlled by a guest player. That said, one of the two doors in the gaming room slid open, allowing Harle to enter. Predictably, she played the role of the court jester. And seemed to be very good at role-playing, staying in the game world despite Jazz's metagaming propositions.
Morton's own role-playing wasn't overly impressive either, and he demanded to know where the Sunstone was. Though he asked the question of Diablo, the evil GM answered from the King's perspective.
Please proceed to page three of this adventure to delve deeper into Diablo's Dark World.
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