Ambrose - Instructor's Report 5

Recent Duties: Thankfully, there's only one week of classes left. It's not that you're running short of material; in fact, you are proud to offer a very high level of class content. The problem arises because of the dichotomy between your needs and the Academy budget. Those Iron Chef ingredients weren't cheap, and have left you with very little money to work with for your last few classes. Unfortunately, it doesn't appear that you'll be able to garnish your final exams with some champagne.

Faculty Relations: (Holding the title of a faculty member entails participation in several bureaucratic and administrative endeavors that you would much rather avoid. Prestige has its price.)

-The damning WABco report has reached the police department's downtown bureau. The Academy has yet to receive a copy, but Samuel seems prepared to assume the worst. Especially after hearing that a member of the police commission will be visiting the institution this afternoon to personally deliver WABco's findings. In response, Samuel has arranged a mandatory staff meeting to welcome the police commissioner and attempt some damage control. As a member of the public relations team, you are sure to be at the forefront of this meeting. Recruits are even being released early from period three to accomodate this faculty gathering.

Personal Notes:

-A class on high society simply can't be taught without high financing. Tragically, you've already depleted your Academy budget. At this point, your only hope for providing necessary class materials is through sponsorship. Fortunately, Mayor Don Atchison has always claimed to be a strong supporter of local law enforcement, and also owns a high-end clothing store, Atch & Co. It's the look men wear.

-Cimarron, Major Pain and Strider are collaborating to prepare some evening exercise for the recruits. Apparently, it's tradition to put together a training scenario at a special facility south of the Academy. Unfortunately, you've been assigned to help them 'supervise' this event. Somehow, you get the feeling this will be less dignified than your typical soirees. And also less clean.

-While you're on the topic, you've just about had enough of Major Pain. The man's a major cad. After weeks of cohabitation, you're still unable to zone out his shouts and clamor as he goes about his very early morning exercises. And in addition to all your previous humiliations at his hands, he's now begun harping on your spending history. To be honest, your retaliation is long overdue. A fellow as grubby as the Major must have some dirt in his past that can be dug up for your benefit.

-Handel, the reknowned classical composer, is set to guest-conduct the Cormus Symphony next weekend. All the city's elite will doubtless gather to hear the Electran's newest compositions. You would love to attend this concert, but unfortunately your current lack of an expense account precludes the purchase of symphony tickets. It seems you might just have to wait until the songs are released on compact disc.

Mini-Objective:

-Get Atch & Co. to sponsor today's class by providing high quality vestments.

John McGuire – Recruit's Report 5

Recent Duties: Few obstacles remain on the path to graduation. There's only one more week of classes, capped by a series of final exams. Following that, there's just the graduation ceremony. Frankly, you're not sure which of these will wind up being the most painful, but you have a feeling it'll be a photo finish either way. There's also a special exercise planned for tonight. You've heard rumours it might be a live fire exercise, which is really your favorite kind. You're all about the pass/fail kind of assignments. It's like each day on the streets, where a successful day is marked by your survival. And failure? Not so much.

Hunches:

-That incident with Old Man Willow was certainly strange. You're not sure how much you like being beat on by giant trees. It might be worth taking precautions to make sure you can get the jump on any other angry forest creatures. A bit of bait and a few explosions should be all it takes.

Personal Notes:

-With the swift approach of final exams, you're sure to hear a lot about the importance of studying and books. Especially from that Wheatie guy. The poor kid's probably under the impression that academics are the only way to go. You're more of a hands-on kind of guy, and you've long understood that street smarts trump book smarts every time. That's a lesson they don't seem to teach here at the Academy, and it's one that's long overdue.

-You can barely remember the pep rally last week. Which means you must really have been into the spirits of the whole thing. Still, you find it hard to believe that you were actually convinced to wear that ridiculous Coffeepot suit, despite the photographic evidence to that effect. Even more surprisingly, it didn't seem to compromise your dodgeball skills. When it comes to hitting people hard, you're still one of the best on the block.

Mini-Objective:

-Take every opportunity to prove that street smarts trump book smarts every time.

Neji – Recruit's Report 5

Recent Duties: Few obstacles remain on the path to graduation. There's only one more week of classes, capped by a series of final exams. Following that, there's just the graduation ceremony. Of course, that will just mark the beginning of your crimefighting career. It's a means to an end, but not an end unto itself. Deep musings aside, you've also heard that a special training exercise is being planned for this evening. You're not sure what it's all about, but it should give you another chance to prove yourself.

Mystical Rumblings: (When bereft of all other senses, your mind's eye can still guide the way, fueled by the powers of katra.)

-Old Man Willow's attack still disturbs you. Though blindfolded, you expected your inner senses to guide you towards victory. Instead, you found yourself in a violent encounter with a tree. Even when tangling with this foe, you resisted the temptation to break the rules of the exercise. You believe this speaks well to your character, though Strider doesn't seem to agree. Still, only great darkness could twist the forest into such a malicious form. Clearly, it's not a safe place for young hobbits like Frodo, or impetuous Pippin for that matter.

Personal Notes:

-That pep rally was unlike anything you've seen baxk home. When your people wish to restore spirit, they either engage in mass meditation or dodgeball. The notion of donning togas and hailing a bizarrely costumed mascot is quite alien to your kind. At least there was decent food, though not of the Subway variety.

-How could the Purple Cobras be defeated? Truly, it is a sad day when an official ADAA (Armorian Dodgeball Association of Armoria) team captain is bested by a giant coffeepot. It can only mean that more training is required, and Major Pain, for one, certainly seems to agree. He has promised that today's class will involve some painful lessons on the finer points of catching. And getting hit with things. Probably painful things. You're looking forward to it.

-You intend to continue your vigilance by keeping an eye on Frodo. Last week's events briefly seemed to lift his spirits, but they have since fallen again. Possibly due to being excluded in Dodgeball. Anyway, he seems unwilling to confide in anyone, Sam apparently included. Perhaps what he needs is an annonymous outlet that he can use to relieve his stress. You've heard of such teen helplines, though they obviously are not prevalent on your homeworld. Perhaps by setting one up, you'll be able to get to the bottom of this. It's long overdue.

Mini-Objective:

-Set up a phone line for distressed youths.

John Watson – Crime Doctor 5

Recent Duties: Few obstacles remain on the path to graduation. There's only one more week of classes, capped by a series of final exams. Following that, there's just the graduation ceremony. Which means you'll have yet another framed degree to add to your burgeoning collection. You've also heard that a special training exercise is being planned for this evening. The purpose and nature of this activity remains an open question, but as the Crime Doctor, it's one you're certainly ideally suited to answer.

Newspaper Headlines:

-The planetary papers are still filled with news on the Vietnam scandal. Little new information seems to have emerged regarding the incident, but it still remains fodder for the pundits. With that in mind, you've decided to glance through local papers to get the rest of your daily news.

-The Cormus Daily Planet has a front page article on a series of bomb threats that have been recorded throughout the city. Several buildings were evacuated as a result. The vast majority of these calls appear to have been hoaxes. In fact, the most recent bombing occured about two weeks ago, at a southside establishmend called The Snooker Shack. It's not clear if the perpetrators of that explosion are connected with the most recent string of threats. Police speculate that all these false alarms might be distractions for the real target. In an exclusive interview, Inspector Keanu Reeves admits he is currently 'blown away' by this case, and that no suspects have been detained.

Mysteries:

-The pear-shaped nature of the recent murder on Baker Street continues to unnerve Mrs. Hudson. At this time, her top suspect remains the dodgy Roger Thornberry, though the police seem to have given little credence to her suspicions. Wiggins has been looking into the case in his spare time, and has determined that the only suspicious persons spotted on the street that evening consisted of your own party. The identity of the victim remains unknown; it seems the police must be deliberately withholding its release, though Wiggins has no idea why they would do so.

Personal Notes:

-Thanks to your subtle skills of subterfuge, it seems you were able to avoid attracting the attention of the religious visitors. Unfortunately, this has called your credentials into question among your fellow students. Some of them don't even seem to believe that you're really a qualified doctor. You thought that you were through with your doctoral defense long ago, but it seems you might have to go through a repise. The time for you to prove your educational achievements to your colleagues is long overdue.

-You've long had an interest in the world of publishing. Particularly in the area of mysteries inspired by real events. As it stands, most of that genre is totally elementary. The works of Hercule Poirot, one of Corsair's most over-rated detectives, are no exception. You borrowed one of his books, The ABC Murders from the Academy library about a week ago, and it has only fueled your contempt for the publishing industry.

Mini-Objective:

-Take every opportunity to prove that you're a real doctor, though without admitting that you don't so much have a medical license at the moment.

(Keep a careful and accurate list of your medical marvels here.)

Wheatie – Recruit's Report 5

Recent Duties: Few obstacles remain on the path to graduation. There's only one more week of classes, capped by a series of final exams. Following that, there's just the graduation ceremony. Hopefully all your instructors will provide a concise and clear review of the course content this week so that you'll know where to place your priorities during studying. Unfortunately, you've heard rumours that there will be some kind of special training exercise this evening. This is a huge disturbance to your intensive studying regimen. Worse yet, you've heard that Major Pain may be involved in planning this activity. You've done all you can to avoid him over the course of your studies here, and you're not looking forward to being at his mercy once again.

Book Report:

-Not only have you reorganized the entire contents of the library, but you've also cleaned up the whole room. The thick layer of dust that coated the floor proved to be no match for the Roomba you 'won' at the pep rally. That thing is tough. Despite being shot by Major Pain, it still seems to function, albeit a bit slower than before. Which also makes it easier for you to get out of its way. So it's kind of win-win. In order to ensure maximum cleanliness, you left the Roomba running in there when you closed up the library last night.

Notes from Home:

-Upon hearing that your finals are approaching, your mother sent you a care package to help with your studies. It has a bunch of cool stuff in it, like pencils and pens marked with your name (your REAL name, not this ridiculous Wheatie business) along with a whole package of neon amber highlighters and a really big yellow ruler.

Personal Notes:

-That pep rally was a big hit! You can tell that school spirit has been revived and percolated, just the way Boily the Coffeepot would want it to be. Instructor Millernia was very impressed with the way you planned the whole thing. You have a feeling you might be getting the 'Social Skills' award for that one. Take that, Circe!

-Speaking of which, the new student(s) at the Academy have been really disruptive. Circe seems to think that she can just come in and take over the whole grade curve. And that Rufus is a monster! His idea of playing matches your idea of pain.

-Some of the books are still missing from the library. It's past time something was done to recover this missing reading material. You've decided to take matters into your own hands and personally track down the guilty parties. Instructor Millernia has approved your plan and dubbed you a bookcop. You didn't know that such a position existed, but if it does, it's totally yours. The following books are missing, without records of who 'borrowed' them from the library:

-The ABC Murders, a mystery book written by Corsair detective Hercule Poirot.

-A book teaching the topic of Risk Management.

-A Police Conduct Handbook.

-Le Petit Prince, one of the library's few French novels, is also missing in action.

Mini-Objective:

-Locate and rescue all the overdue library books and make sure that all transgressors are warned about the gravity of their wrongdoings!

Caesar – Recruit's Report 3

Recent Duties: Few obstacles remain on the path to graduation. There's only one more week of classes, capped by a series of final exams. Following that, there's just the graduation ceremony. Assuming that you graduate. It's your understanding that missing eight days (over a fifth of the total term) is usually enough to sink a recruit's chances of passing. Of course, your case is a bit different. And more eXtreme. Because it involves injuries and pain. In the line of duty. You have to believe Major Pain will view this as an acceptable excuse. It may be your only hope.

Your Status:

-It's been two weeks since you landed in a hospital bed at Cormus General. You don't remember much of those early days; Bomb Voyage blew you up pretty good. Some of the doctors later admitted that you were lucky to have survived. You'd rather classify it as skill.

-You had a few visitors while bedridden. Yumi came by several times. Fortunately, she escaped the incident mostly unscathed. Instructor Millernia also stopped by, bearing a card signed by all the personnel at the Academy. Although you don't remember anyone named Boily the Coffeepot or Grand Papillon. Perhaps transfer students or substitute instructors? Anyway, aside from this, your hospital time was a nightmare of unending Jeopardy, though at least the food was better than Academy fare.

Path to Justice: (After the experience of dealing with Bomb Voyage, you are more ready than ever to develop your Sword of Justice technique.)

-Indeed, since returning to the Academy, you've had much greater success with your signature technique. If Kurando isn't impressed by the way you saved his daughter, he should certainly be impressed by the new length and power of your Sword of Justice.

Personal Notes:

-Your stereo is missing from your room. Actually, you're not too surprised. After having been gone for eight days, you're surprised it wasn't total open season on all your stuff. Apparently would-be looters were mostly intimidated by your bed fortress.

-While searching around for your stereo early this morning, you happened to glance into the entertainment room. Amazingly enough, Mugsy was already awake, and was busy doing a crazy amount of photocopying. You're not sure what was going on, but since it didn't involve your stereo, you decided not to bother finding out.

-That Bomb Voyage is an eXtreme supervillain! What's worse, the dude seemed to have it out specifically for Yumi. And he's still on the loose! There's no way to know when he might strike next. Whenever it is, you intend to be there, serving up a steaming plate of pure justice. But for now, you've just gotta hope his attack doesn't cause you to bomb in all your classes.

Mini-Objective:

-Find ways to make up for all the class material you've missed.

-Remind everyone that you've only been gone for eight days, and that your absences were all cleared by the doctor's note you brought back from the hospital.

There was a training exercise called Wheatie VS The Hobbits, Wheatie wins it for team PCs versus the villainous Ambrose and his shadowy adviser, Fu Manchu. Just as everyone was about to gloat about their victory and pretend they were Nazghul to terrify Frodo, Maestro Handel walked in to use terrible puns against us.Ambrose apparently knew he was in town and was dying to go see his surprise symphony, which based on the ensuing battle would have left the audience dead.

Handel had some Hand Clan goons with him, and chaos ensued. Caesar whipped out his Sword of Justice before collapsing like a 5 dollar bill. Ambrose was a self-proclaimed force of pure futility, missing for the majority of the battle. The Johns shot people. Neji punched. Wheatie thought. And so victory was achieved. Then Strider and the rest of the jerks showed up after having acquired their Taco Bell, and Handel was arrested. Once again proving, Dave is evil even when he doesn't have a character. Somehow.

Note: Special thanks to Caesar for writing this summary.

Kurando Enchiro
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Retired Police Officer
Kurando Enchiro is a tall man with a very stiff, upright posture and a vaguely oriental countenance. He's clearly approaching senior citizens' status, with much gray streaking his dark hair, though his athleticism belies his age. Kurando wears a purple and blue Kendo ghi along with white socks and sandals. His persistance and unyielding nature is demonstrated by his unwillingness to conform with modern footwear trends. These traits served him well during his years on the Cormus Police Force, allowing him, in turn, to serve the city well. In fact, Kurando's family has a long history with law enforcement and the pursuit of justice. Kurando's daughter, Yumi, also works at the downtown police bureau. Extremely protective of his only child, Kurando has spent much of his time since retirement striving to keep her away from unsavoury influences.

Master NORG
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Police Commissioner
Master NORG is a police commissioner who sits on the Cormus PD's governing board. Though not the Chief Commissioner, he still wields considerable bureaucratic power. As one would expect from a man whose name is spelled entirely with capitals, NORG is a big fellow with an even bigger sense of entitlement. His puffy skin has a strange yellowish hue, and his brown eyes are small and beady. He wears voluminous white robes with drooping sleeves and blue lining. NORG is always seated in a small hoverpod that serves as his main mode of transportation. It's unclear if this is due to any sort of disability or simply because of his considerable girth. The only thing NORG believes in more than bureaucractic procedures is the bottom line.

Handel
Race: Electran
Affiliation: Composer
Handel is an Electran composer and maestro who is an emerging star on the classical music scene. His compositions are known for incorporating sophisticated instrumentation and numerous surprise endings. However, Handel's public persona doesn't include his association with the Hand-Clan and his devotion to its leader, Jimmy the Hands. As a handsome man of the renaissance, Handel is almost always dressed in period attire. This includes a dark three-piece suit, complete with ruffles and lace at the wrists and collar. He also wears a maestro's coat with the requisite long tails, and a curly white wig. In combat, Handel is capable of orchestrating the flow of battle. This allows him to do such things as grant rests to his followers, or make them forte. When all else fails, Handel can also resort to using his conductor's baton as an admittedly ineffective weapon.