Neji – Inspector's Report 33

Recent Duties: Four days have passed since the arrest of your former colleagues. Their undoing was long in coming, and you could sense them gradually growing more susceptible to such notions of street justice. As police officers, it is nothing less than your duty to stand as a shining model of law and order. Those who cannot meet this high standard have no place on the force, and must be punished as dictated by the law in order to show others that such behaviour cannot be accepted. In recognition of your service in this undercover operations, and in light of recent officer shortages, Inspector Valtyrez reqeuested and received authorization for your promotion to the rank of full inspector.

Civic News: (News regarding Cormus' municipal government.)

-It appears that the crime wave which recently submerged the city of Cormus might finally be receeding, leaving much damage in its wake. Though many police officers were lost during the confrontations with the Shadow Cult and the Constructicons, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has successfully reinforced the police department by allowing the Church of Cormus to participate in law enforcement operations. However, the judiciary branch of law enforcement remains overwhelmed by the recent surge of arrests. Complaints have surfaced from several defense lawyers that judges such as Hiram Mightor have been rushing their cases through court in order to keep up with the load of incoming cases, and in so doing have been ignoring fundamental aspects of the Deksiilan constitution. Despite this, the courts remain extremely backed up, and citizens are growing concerned with rumours of deplorable conditions in the already overcrowded cells of Guantanimo prison.

The Street Beat:

-Word on the street surrounding Precinct 13 has been all about the new taxis that have been seen cruising the streets. This area has historically been the turf of Emerald Cabs. Having employed Akill's services in the past, you can testify to just how territorial the Emerald drivers can become, so you're anticipating some intense rivalry now that Precinct 17's DC Cabs have been spotted in the area. In fact, you've often seen one of these foreign cars pulling up right in front of Monk's Coffeeshop. That certainly takes a lot of nerve, but that's probably one thing that is not lacking in most cab drivers.

Personal Notes:

-At the same time, you cannot help feeling some regret for the way things were resolved following the confrontation at Elysium Incorporated. You distrust Rhadamanthys every bit as much as your former comrades, with the crucial distinction that you understand that the law cannot be secondary to your own whims and hunches. All the same, some of them did do great deeds in protecting the people of Cormus, and they deserve to be accorded all the dignity and respect proper for prisoners of the state

-On that note, you've been hearing some disturbing rumours regarding the treatment of prisoners being held at Guantanimo prison. The facility has a reputation as one of the most secure prisons on the planet, but it has been investigated several times over the past decade for alleged prisoner abuse scandals. Despite calls from several peace organizations, the Cormus department has kept the prison open as both an effective holding facility and as an efficient means of extracting information from dangerous offenders. You're not sure who is in charge of this operation, but you have some doubts that it is being run entirely up to standards. Inspector Valtyrez seems to share your concerns, and has given you some time off from other cases to look into the matter.

-More to the point, recent events have been most unfortunate for the Dodgeball league. You have even had to cancel on your games because you had no replacements for your incarcerated teammates. Although you considered the possibility of getting them day passes to play in the game, you decided that prisoners would not set a good example for any youths attending watching the event.

Team I.Q. (3-1) vs The Point Blank RIFLES (4-0) – Point Blank Rifles.

The Bloody Wrenches (3-1) vs The Bad Dudes (1-3) – The Bloody Wrenches.

Raging Butterflies (2-2) vs 7-11 Closers (0-4) – Raging Butterflies.

Divine Dodgers (2-2) vs The Red Pill (1-3)– The Red Pill.

Mini-Objective:

-Ensure that your imprisoned former colleagues receive proper and dignified treatment.

-In addition, try to convince them to cooperate with police to avoid exacerbating their situation.

Wheatie – Prisoner's Report 34

Recent Events: It's now been four days since you were arrested by Inspector Valtyrez and Neji. Four days since you last saw the open sky, or the peaceful urban fields. Four days since you were sent to Guantanimo prison. Guantanimo prison – you sent a lot of criminals here, but you never thought you'd be visiting yourself. At least not as an inmate. Conditions here are every bit as bad as you'd heard, and perhaps even worse. Of course, you don't intend to complain too stringently. If there's any chance of getting out on good behaviour, you intend to take it. That might be you only chance to keep this off your permanent academic record...

Prison Conditions:

-Upon arriving at the prison, you were quickly processed and transferred to the facility's medium security wing, where many dangerous offenders are being stored. You've been kept in solitary confinement so far, which is probably a blessing in disguise. Most of the people held here aren't the sort you want to know personally. Prison officials have also taken away all your possessions, forced you into an uncomfortable red jumpsuit and have left you with nothing but a dark, empty cell. You also haven't been allowed any contact with the outside world, including the much vaunted phonecall. Furthermore, you haven't received so much as a grain of real sustenance. They have slipped a couple stale donuts through the slot in your cell, but nothing of real nutritional value. Medical staff have visited a couple times, but only because they want to keep you injected with some sort of psi-draining chemical. Under normal circumstances, you would be really curious about such a cool chemistry compound, but slumping in a tiny cell is hardly normal circumstances.

-Your psi points have been reduced to 0.

Legal Report:
-The case against you might be fairly compelling, but you're certain that it can be beaten with the proper evidence and testimony. The charges are likely to involve assault, excessive force and disobeying orders. In response, you intend to argue that you were coerced by the determination of your allies, and to establish your impeccable character through an examination of your past record. You have no doubt that a talented legal representative such as Nicholas Chesterly would have no trouble winning with such a defense. Unfortunately, you haven't yet had a chance to confer with your former protege, or to speak with any sort of legal representative. Of course, you're well aware of the huge backlog facing the legal system, so you fear it might take quite some time before your case finds its way in front of a judge. Still, you have confidence that the case will be resolved according to proper prisoner, and you intend to be a model prisoner until such occurs.

Book Report:
-They wouldn't even let you keep a copy of Le Petit Robert dictionary. However, you have heard that Guantanimo prison does have its own library. Several of the criminals you sent here were forced to do community service in this very facility. There must be some way to gain access to this amenity!

Notes from Home:

-Having had no contact with the outside world, you obviously haven't had the opportunity to seek bail from your parents. It's probably best that you spare them the stress in any case. This is all really just a big misunderstanding, and you're hoping that Nicholas Chesterly can make that clear as soon as your case makes it to court. In the meantime, you hope to avoid being upsetting your family. Because that would almost certainly lead to you being grounded, or maybe even expelled from school! No!!

Personal Notes:

-You never expected when you first took up the plow of the Harvester that it would end up leading you to prison. Sure, you did end up breaking procedure, but it was only in the name of harvesting justice. You're still surprised that Neji would tell on you, especially given her own feelings regarding Rhadamanthys. Well you're not normally one to criticize tattlers, you do find her position in this a bit hypocritical.

Mini-Objective:

-Find a way to gain access to the prison library.

-Be on your best behaviour, and admonish any colleagues who don't do the same.

John Watson – Prison Doctor 29

Recent Events: You have the right to remain silent. Everything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You've heard local law enforcement use such lines on innumerable occaisons, but four days ago was the first time they've been directed at you. After handcuffing you, they wasted no time in sending you straight to Guantanimo prison, where you have yet to receive any legal consultation or contact with the outside world. You rather suspect that this isolation is the product of Lestrade's bias, and given his bureaucratic influence, you don't expect to be accorded such rights any time in the near future. Certainly not fast enough to stop Rhadamanthys and his sinister schemes.

Prison Conditions:

-Upon arriving at the prison, you were quickly processed and transferred to the facility's medium security wing, where many dangerous offenders are being stored. You've been kept in solitary confinement so far, which is probably a blessing in disguise. Most of the people held here aren't the sort you want to know personally. Prison officials have also taken away all your possessions, forced you into an uncomfortable red jumpsuit and have left you with nothing but a dark, empty cell. You also haven't been allowed any contact with the outside world, including the much vaunted phonecall. Furthermore, you haven't received any real sustenance to speak of, even during tea time. They have slipped a couple stale donuts through the slot in your cell, but they certainly can't be counted as biscuits under any definition of the word. Medical staff have visited a couple times, but only because they want to keep you injected with a psi-draining chemical. You reckon you'll have to figure out how to make this compound using your chemistry set, as it could prove to be quite useful.

-Your psi points have been reduced to 0.

Newspaper Headlines:

-Given your importance, a rational observer would likely believe that your shocking and unjustified arrest would make the very front page of the paper. Instead, you suspect that your name probably isn't even mentioned in connection with the assault on Rhadamanthys. And for once, you're just a bit glad to be limited to the background. This is probably the first time that being saddled with front men has worked to the advantage of your reputation.

Personal Notes:

-Your current predicament once again merely proves the incompetence of the police. They've arrested the wrong man, and in the process have allowed the true criminals to escape scot-free. Furthermore, you know full well that the police don't have a chance of thwarting a master criminal such as Rhadamanthys when left to their own devices. As such, it is imperative that you exit this prison without delay, and since the legal process is not proceeding, it will be up to other means. Fortunately, you are well suited to the task. While others might see this facility as an impregnable fortress, you have observed that there are several cracks in the security, and as the Prison Doctor, you intend to diagnose and exploit them.

-One such security hole is the fact that prisoners are expected to perform community service within Guantanimo during the course of their sentence. You have already determined that the ideal place for you to fulfill this requirement would be in the prison's metal shop. Little do the guards know that your scientific knowledge and the tools available in this lab will make it trivial to devise several fool-proof escape plans. And that's good, because many people in this prison are undeniably fools.

Mini-Objective:

-Find a way to get into the prison metal shop.

-Plan as many escape plans as possible, without alerting the suspicion of the guards.

Saavik – Prisoner's Report 11

Recent Events: It has been four days since your incarceration in Guantanimo prison. You find it odd how quickly officers of the law can fall to being villified as little more than the criminals they have always fought against. Speaking candidly, this is why you have never been able to trust the police, even while being part of them. You are only too aware of how hard and inflexible they can be, when they are not outright corrupt. They do not realise how this attitude blinds them, much as your emotionless facade once impaired your own vision. Only now can you look at the situation without benefit of such rose-colored glasses.

Prison Conditions:

-Upon arriving at the prison, you were quickly processed and transferred to the facility's medium security wing, where many dangerous offenders are being stored. You've been kept in solitary confinement so far, which is probably a blessing in disguise. Most of the people held here aren't the sort you want to know personally. Prison officials have also taken away all your possessions, forced you into an uncomfortable red jumpsuit and have left you with nothing but a dark, empty cell. You also haven't been allowed any contact with the outside world, including the much vaunted phonecall. Furthermore, they have even stripped you of your tricorder, preventing you from recording further personal logs. Not that you would likely do so, given their propensity to use such information against you. They have slipped a couple stale donuts through the slot in your cell, but they certainly can't be counted as nutrition under any definition of the word. Medical staff have visited a couple times, but only because they want to keep you injected with a psi-draining chemical. A very logical measure, given that they are well aware of your abilities.

-Your psi points have been reduced to 0.

Tech Report:

-It is your understanding that this prison forces its inmates to perform community service within the facility while sentences are being served. These tasks seem to range from a prison library, to a produce warehouse and a supply depot. Your expertise with inventory techniques would make you ideal for any sort of supply task. Of course, you do not intend to stay here long in order to do any such job.

Tricorder Analysis:

-Your tricorder was taken upon your capture, and you find yourself sorely missing its presence. Without it, analysing your present circumstances becomes yet more difficult. In addition, all the private information stored within can offer a deeper glance into your mind than any methods Dr. Freud might have been able to devise. The thought of one of these treacherous inspectors decoding the beeps of your own brain is a thought you do not wish to contemplate.

Impersonal Notes:

-As for your own imprisonment, you actually find it oddly soothing. Finally, there is something on this world that you can understand. You have spent most of your time here a confused shell, trying to comprehend your own actions and having no success in decoding those of others. This had frustrated you to the point that you lost yourself, acting on base instinct. And your baser instincts are hardly pretty. However, you have learned that in being a rose, you cannot forget your thorns. There are yet those who must be pricked.

-It is your belief that Valeris is also being held somewhere within this prison. You have not seen her since the confrontation with Devastator, and you would go to any lengths for an opportunity to speak with her. You are still concerned with how she might be dealing with the fallout of that incident, and you believe your words might be able to ease her burden.

-Neji and Inspector Valtyrez might have been upholding the law, but they certainly were not aiding the cause of justice. Given their supposed faith, you are very much disappointed that they would stand to protect one such as Rhadamanthys. They apparently do not understand that the law is only a tool created by the people to serve the people. It is not an end onto itself.

Mini-Objective:

-Locate and meet up with Valeris.

-Insist to everyone that you were right all along about the corruption on this police force.

Jackie - Driver's Report 22

Recent Duties: It has been six days since you fulfilled your purpose here on Deksiil and rescued young Arriko from the clutches of Ricky Tan, who is totally not going to be in any more adventures or sequels. It has also been six days since you were fired by the IBI. Apparently they did not share your opinion that the girl was the only thing that mattered. Koizumi Li promised to get you a job with the Wok, as soon as the Deksiilan branch of the chain sorts itself out. In the meantime, you have started working as a taxi driver for DC Cabs. Once you were licensed to make arrests, but now you are just licensed to drive.

Civic News: (News regarding Cormus' municipal government.)

-It appears that the crime wave which recently submerged the city of Cormus might finally be receeding, leaving much damage in its wake. Though many police officers were lost during the confrontations with the Shadow Cult and the Constructicons, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has successfully reinforced the police department by allowing the Church of Cormus to participate in law enforcement operations. However, the judiciary branch of law enforcement remains overwhelmed by the recent surge of arrests. Complaints have surfaced from several defense lawyers that judges such as Hiram Mightor have been rushing their cases through court in order to keep up with the load of incoming cases, and in so doing have been ignoring fundamental aspects of the Deksiilan constitution. Despite this, the courts remain extremely backed up, and citizens are growing concerned with rumours of deplorable conditions in the already overcrowded cells of Guantanimo prison.

Wokking Home:

-You are very popular, at least among the Li family. Koizumi was extremely happy to be reunited with his daughter, and plans to resume his position as CEO of the Wok so that the restaurant chain can continue to prosper under the Li dynasty. You were sad to see them leave for Electra, but you hope to join them as soon as you get a job with the Wok. On the other hand, you were more than ready to see Chris Tucker off the planet. His vacation is finally over, so you might not be hearing from him again for a while. Especially if you turn off your phone, which you plan to do as soon as you see him calling. The two of you make pretty good partners, but you still can't understand most of the words that come out of that guy's big mouth.

Plugging the Meter:

-Getting hired as a driver for Precinct 17's DC Cabs was easy for one with your driving skills. You just had to show them what a Mr Nice Guy you were, and they wasted no time in giving you a route and a cab. The route in question happens to include most of Precinct 13, which means you can still hang out at Monk's around lunch time. However, you had no idea that the taxi industry was so competitive. Apparently, this area has traditionally been the exclusive territory of Emerald Cabs, and they don't seem to appreciate your incursion onto their turf.

Personal Notes:

-You're finding it hard to adjust back to civilian life, and to the fact that you are no longer allowed to do all sorts of crazy stunts in the name of the law. Now you just do the crazy stunts in order to get your passengers to their destinations faster. As part of your attempts to assimilate yourself into the cab culture, you've started growing a soul patch on your chin. The Anthropologist has told you that this is a great way to blend in with the other drivers.

-Where did everybody go? Monk's has been mostly empty for the past couple days. The only one you've seen in there has been Neji. You're not sure what happened to your other colleagues, but you suspect they might have been fired. After all, if it could happen to you, it could surely befall them as well.

Mini-Objective:

-Show off your amazing driving skills while providing taxi service to the people of Precinct 13.

Jeff: So how about that last session of COPs?

Garrett: What? Oh yeah! I SCHOOLED you on that chart!

Jeff: ... I'm glad to see you remember the important parts.

Garrett: Why, what else could be important?

Jeff: Like how Neji could be so smarmy, eating lunch by herself at Monk's and relishing the table-space. She probably got us arrested just to get the table to herself!

Garrett: You're right, that IS smarmy!

Jeff: And then Jackie pulls up in his new job as a taxi driver and takes out an innocent cyclist by opening his door. That soul patch of his was also especially smarmy.

Garrett: Yeah well the cyclist deserved it. POW!

Jeff: That may be true. At least Neji actually did something almost good for once when she came out to help Jackie when the cyclist attacked him. That cycling move was pretty obnoxious.

Garrett: Yeah. Hey, are you only buying two bags of carrots?

Jeff: Umm, I was thinking of it, yes.

Garrett: Are you sure that will last you? You should buy more.

Jeff: Good thing you're here to manage my shopping, Garrett...

Garrett: I know.

Jeff: ... Well anyway, that Crazy Taxi mini-game was pretty awesome, wasn't it? Jackie had to drive around Nicholas Chesterly, Romul and J. Peterman, and beat the evil Emerald Cabs taxi driver Akil!

Garrett: Whoo! Go Romul!

Jeff: Uhh, right. Anyway, the rest of us had it a lot worse, locked up in the prison. I can't believe you had Wheatie squeal like a baby and tell them everything about Dr. Wagner when Vladislav interrogated you. My interrogation was so much better. Lestrade didn't stand a chance! He thinks HE's the new detective mastermind in this town, but --

Garrett: Ewww! Are you buying shrimp?

Jeff: What's wrong with shrimp?!

Garrett: Well it's okay if it's fried and breaded. Hey, about these battered mozerella sticks!

Jeff: Alright alright, fine, we'll take them. Anyway, weren't you worried when they threw you in the cell with Rawk Hawk? He was gonna take you out!

Garrett: Whatever, I just would have told on him.

Jeff: You did anyway, if I recall. The rest of us didn't whine as much but we weren't much better off. Saavik was with Colonel Blood, and I was stuck with the french: Bomb Voyage!

Garrett: I like the French. Well, Wheatie does anyway.

Jeff: Right. It's a good thing Colonel Blood gave us his ingenius plan for smuggling items around the prison. I'm not quite sure how you got a recliner chair down your pan--

Garrett: What?! No, don't buy Mr. Noodles! Ichi-ban is way better! It means Number 1 in Japan! Hah, that's so great!

Jeff: Alright, fine, I'm not that picky...

Garrett: Besides, if you don't like it, I will be more than happy to come over to your house and eat it for you.

Jeff: Why not, you guys already devour the rest of our food.

Garrett: Weren't you talking about the adventure, man? Geez, get back on topic!

Jeff: Hey, you were there too! Don't you remember going to the mess hall and talking to the criminals there? There were so many of them, most of whom we'd arrested. Dr. Falstav, Hazaltan, Carmen Sandiego, Aquaman, Marco Escobito... At least Falstav gave us his crazy plan to escape. I still can't BELIEVE Carmen Sandiego didn't have one.

Garrett: That's where Saavik wasted her time talking to Tairix, right? Sheesh, we can talk to him all the time!

Jeff: Yeah, I didn't think he'd have a plan either. Good thing we got more in the Library, Metal Shop and Item Depot, as well as the materials to carry them out. It was no surprise that Doc Ock was building a set of Super Armor, but I was a little surprised Colonel Sebastian Moran was planning to escape via balloons on a chair.

Garrett: Jeff, don't forget to buy chips, although I suspect *I* will eat most of them. Ho ho ho.

Jeff: Hmph, I bet. Hey look, there's some more of those Playdo chips you ate, want some more of those too?

Garrett: Ewww, no! Don't the Lays come in an even bigger bag, Jeff?

Jeff: Whatever! Putting together those plans was awesome. Though I'm a little surprised some of them were as effective as they were. I can't believe the Leader had one of the best ideas to escape. The only crappy thing is, we really didn't need them in the end.

Garrett: Right, how'd we get out again?

Jeff: We can't say here, we don't want Neji to overhear it.

Garrett: RIGHT. Wasn't she at the prison too? She gave me a subway.

Jeff: Yes, apparently she'd come to "see to our concerns." This probably involved executing us at some point. The Subway was our last supper. I'm sure some people would want to kill themselves after eating one of those anyway [Alright, THIS is the most accurate part.].

Garrett: You know when our family goes camping, we buy tons and tons of JUNK! Dozens of chocolate-covered granola bars. Because you must eat like 7 a day. At least! I love it, it's SOOO good!

Jeff: Well no granola bars today. Anyway, we'll just skip the part where we got out and jump to the fire escape, where our 'secret' escape seemed to last for all of 5 seconds before Neji and Vladislav came charging after us and Inspector Lestrade tried to block the escape to the roof.

Garrett: JEFF! Aren't you gonna buy some of these frosted cookies along with your hamburger buns?

Jeff: NO, Garrett! The cart's overflowing as it is.

Garrett: Yeah, those chips take up a lot of space.

Jeff: ... We're almost done anyway. Things were looking bad in that stairwell though. Tairix was a tank but without psi-points, he was no machine and Vladislav kept gunning us down.

Garrett: And Lestrade had WAAY too many hit points!

Jeff: More than he deserved, that's for sure!

Cashier: Wow, it sounds like a tight spot! How did you get out of it?

Jeff: ?? You...uhh, know about COPs?

Cashier: Well who doesn't? Everybody watches it!

Jeff: Err, right. We were saved by Jackie who came running down the stairs in a new tuxedo. Or rather, THE tuxedo. It seemed to make him amazing and we were able to drag everybody out and into a waiting helicopter, where to our surprise we found that Amphion was the pilo--Garrett, aren't you gonna help me unload these?

Garrett: Well I would if I thought there was some way I could be helpful, but I can't really get in here...

Jeff: Alright fine, stay back, just stand there.

Garrett: That was my original plan.

Cashier: Don't be too hard on him. So anyway what happened?

Jeff: We tried to escape in the chopper, but out of nowhere comes Valtyrez, who flies after us blasting us with psychic power. We didn't have a chance.

Garrett: Hah! Wheatie threw a book at him!

Jeff: Yes, yes he did. It didn't really help though. He shot us down before we had any hope of getting away. Who knows what's going to happen next time, apparently we're just all caught again.

Cashier: I can't wait to see! See you guys later.

Garrett: You know, I don't actually know anything about grocery shopping Jeff. I'm not even really sure what to do in one of these places.

Jeff: You could have fooled me...

Note: Special thanks to John Watson for writing this summary.

The Crazy Cyclist
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Cyclist
This man is no ordinary cyclist, if such a thing exists. While he dresses like a dedicated bicyclist, with the dorky aerodynamic spandex and the fingerless gloves, this fellow also sports huge muscles and large tattoos which befit his title. The crazy cyclist also refuses to wear a helmet at any time, which might well explain why he goes so crazy whenever he's struck by the opening door of a taxi. His retaliation often takes the form of leaping on top of the offending vehicle, breaking its window or attacking its hapless driver with art. When nearly defeated, he's capable of cycling in order to keep the battle going longer.

Akil
Race: Chalchakian
Affiliation: Emerald Cabs
Akil has appeared several times throughout the campaign, but only now receives a character profile because of his direct competition with Jackie's cab driving career. Akil drives a taxi for Emerald Cabs, a taxi company that has traditionally dominated Precinct 13, and is known for employing dark green cars and extremely fast, foreign drivers. Akil fits into this description perfectly, and has earned quite a reputation for his accentuated accent and his mad driving skills. Like most taxi drivers in Cormus, he seems absolutely ruthless when it comes to getting his passengers to their destination, just as he is in acquiring such passengers in the first place.