Neji – Beat Cop's Report 31

Recent Duties: The five days since the defeat of Devastator and his Constructicons have not been nearly enough to repair the scars sustained by the city during the battle. Many streets in the once proud downtown are still torn asunder, a grim final monument to the metal giant who terrorized the city for so long. You had no doubt that Devastator and his followers would fall before the divine might demonstrated by you and Inspector Valtyrez. Even giants must bow before the might of God.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' election.)

-The election is over for now, but this is only a temporary respite from the campaign trail. Under intense pressure, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has consented to call another election within the next two months. In the meantime, he has taken up office at city hall surrounded by an entourage of staunch police officers provided by Scotland Yard. Security is obviously a major concern for the new mayor, and he is currently accepting appointments with only the most important visitors. Thankfully, he has yet to impose any sort of dress code on said visitors.

Divine Rumblings:

-Bob the Builder's crew seems to have done an excellent job rebuilding the Church of Cormus. Not only were they able to recreate the Church's unique architecture, but they were also able to fashion new stainglass windows that are every bit as glorious as their predecessors. How do they do it?! Cardinal Callistus is similarly impressed, though he has also been very busy with the administrative side of the reconstruction.

Personal Notes:

-Though you had been seeing signs of her instability for some time, you still would not have expected Saavik to betray you so overtly. You weren't conscious to see it, but you understand that she and Valeris were absolutely bent on killing Devastator on the spot. They had neither the legal nor the divine right to do any such thing. It seems that Saavik might be more similar to Sybok than she was initially willing to admit, though at least she does not seek to hide under the auspices of the Church.

-In truth, you have lost confidence in most of your companions. Though they may not all be traitors, they are all at least unreliable. Dr. John Watson seems to think of himself as a law enforcement authority, even though he is not at all part of the police force. Anyone who misrepresents himself so should hardly be trusted. Wheatie might mean well, but his reluctance to take action could lead to disaster in any sort of dangerous situation. And Jackie is still a Warchon, though he sometimes tries to hide it. Trust is a precious commodity in times such as this, and you're not sure you can spare much for any of them.

-Mayor Andrew Shuba will be missed. As people walk down the sidewalk of life, which conveniently runs beside the cemetary, you hope they'll spare a moment to glance at his memorial site. Perhaps his death will have meaning so long as people remember what he stood for, and what he stood on.

Team I.Q. (3-0) vs The Bad Dudes (1-2) – Team I.Q.

The Bloody Wrenches (2-1) vs The Red Pill (0-3) – The Bloody Wrenches.

Raging Butterflies (1-2) vs Point Blank RIFLES (3-0) – Point Blank Rifles.

Divine Dodgers (2-1) vs 7-11 Closers (0-3)–The Divine Dodgers.

Mini-Objective:

-Convince Mayor Mycroft Holmes that he must accept the dodgeball league.

Wheatie – Legal Assistant's Report 32

Recent Duties: It's been five days since the battle against Devastator, and the city has yet to recover from his final crimes. The police force will also take some time to recuperate, considering that it has weathered its second betrayel in the same week. In fact, you can barely remember the last few moments of Devastator's life. The last thing you can clearly recall is a pair of Vulcan hands grabbing your forehead, and the ominous beeps of a tricorder filling your mind. This sort of mental domination is clearly against police procedure, and you intend to see that Saavik is made to answer for it. After all, you know better than most that you must reap what you sow.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' election.)

-The election is over for now, but this is only a temporary respite from the campaign trail. Under intense pressure, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has consented to call another election within the next two months. In the meantime, he has taken up office at city hall surrounded by an entourage of staunch police officers provided by Scotland Yard. Security is obviously a major concern for the new mayor, and he is currently accepting appointments with only the most important visitors. Thankfully, he has yet to impose any sort of dress code on said visitors.

Legal Report:
-Your must pressing legal issue is to proceed with Saavik's prosecution. As both a member of her Precinct, and a witness of her betrayel, it seemed totally logical to put you in charge of the crown case against her. Despite recent events, she is still your friend, and you're hoping you can reach a deal before this case is actually brought to court. In the meantime, Saavik has been suspended from active duty. She recently sent you the following statement in relation to the charges you levelled against her:

Isaac,

I recieved notice of the charges laid against me. I will begin without preamble to spare our feelings and your professionalism on the prosecution of this case. I would not want anyone, after the fact, to accuse either of us of acting badly in this legal setting, or cause harm to the position that you hold.

*On the charge of assaulting an officer of the law: *

I submit the plea of not guilty.

There are a few situations in which a person may assault or batter another. They are called priviledges, and the common ones include *self defense*, *consent *(as in sports), and *police conduct. *This is not to say that these are not the only priviledges.

**

The situation that I found myself in was a difficult one. I would have trusted the police to take Valeris in peacefully had they not proven themselves in the past to be untrustworthy. When I attacked Isaac, it was in direct *defense of another*, a clear priviledge under our laws.

**

*On the charge of obstruction of justice:*

I submit the plea of not guilty. This is a strange charge to be laid in conjunction with the events around the fight with Devastator, as this is a charge most commonly laid when

someone has lied to the police or a team of investigators. Another common reason for this charge to be laid has been if a suspect has altered or destroyed evidence. As I have committed neither of these crimes, I can only assume that the charge has then been twisted to mean that the police intended that justice has been defined as *placing Devastator in prison* and obstruction as *the fact that Devastator is dead*.

As I had nothing to do in the actual cause of Devastator's death, which I have been told was executed by a man we know as Tairix, I am clearly not guilty of this crime.

*On the charge of using unnecessary force:*

I submit the plea of not guilty.

The charge of unnecessary force is only levelled against an officer if they have become excessive while making a lawful arrest. As no lawful arrest was being made at the time, this charge is erroneous. If the prosecution wishes to pursue this further, however, the defense will be the same as that to the final two charges.

*On the charge of mental domination of an innocent:*

I submit the plea of not guilty.

As Isaac was attacking Valeris at the time of my attack on him, I submit that I was trying to protect my cousin and again enter the defense of *defense of another*. I will further develop my reasoning for the attack after I answer the final two charges.

*On the charge of refusal to obey police orders:*

I submit the plea of not guilty.

*On the charge of refusal to adhere to mission guidelines:*

I submit the plea of not guilty.

I have not specifically gone over the remaining three charges as my defense to each of them is the same. While there are clearer and more reasonable explinations to the earlier charges, the defense that I am about to outline is one that could also apply to those situations if the prosecution so chose to do so.

My defense is *temporary insanity*. This is a defense of excuse, the reason being that the charges laid against me are valid and yet I should not be held criminally liable for them. I will argue that I was unable to reason between right and wrong in this particular situation. Although generally capable of realizing that murder is unacceptable, from the previous

provocations of Devastator and the recent loss of my brother, I was unable to comprehend that not killing Devastator was law. I was unable to appreciate the nature of my actions against him.

I argue that this is only a temporary affliction as neither before that day nor after have I made any actions towards taking revenge on Doctor Watson, the man who killed my brother.

Book Report:
-You haven't had time for much serious reading lately, but you did find a few moments to scan through a book on scientific patents. Some of the quotes you gleaned from this volume might prove quite useful in a court case someday. Not that you plan to spend much time in court once you finally finish with this work placement, except perhaps as a clerk. That would be kind of cool.

Notes from Home:

-Your parents are proud that you were able to renovate your work area. Of course, you didn't quite mention that you did it with the help of Canadian Tire Guy. Not that he was really much help anyway. He just showed off all his tools, and left the actual handiwork to you and Kojak. The fact that your new legal headquarters survived the assistance of the latter suggests that it must really be quite sturdy.

Personal Notes:

-You've never been a big fan of crazy car chases, especially with Kojak or Jackie at the wheel. They have no respect for the laws of the road! Furthermore, taking on those massive construction vehicles in tiny cars would be akin to sending Nicholas Chesterly against someone with an energy blade. You even had to call on all the powers of the Harvester in order to stop that bulldozer. It was almost as big as the combines you used to drive back on the farm!

-There's supposed to be some big celebration over at Ricky Tan's mansion later this evening. You've heard that most of the city's more prominent citizens are expected to attend. You have also received an invitation, but as the top legal assistant at Precinct 13, you feel your time is too valuable for such events. You might just send Nicholas Chesterly instead. It should cheer him up a bit, and maybe give him a chance to gain a little field experience.

Mini-Objective:

-Direct the legal proceedings that will be initiated against Saavik.

John Watson – Crime Doctor 27

Recent Duties: Five days have passed since the scuffle with Devastator and his lads. The city still bears many scars from that confrontation, particularly in the downtown area. Those streets simply weren't meant to bear lorries of such size, and it shows. You were particularly dismayed by the destruction of the double-decker bus. You're no fan of Scotland Yard, but you have to mourn the passing of such a quint-essentially British symbol. To your knowledge, it was the only one of its kind within the city.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' election.)

-The election is over for now, but this is only a temporary respite from the campaign trail. Under intense pressure, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has consented to call another election within the next two months. In the meantime, he has taken up office at city hall surrounded by an entourage of staunch police officers provided by Scotland Yard. Security is obviously a major concern for the new mayor, and he is currently accepting appointments with only the most important visitors. Thankfully, he has yet to impose any sort of dress code on said visitors.

Newspaper Headlines:

-The editorial staff of the Deksiilan Blue Moon have a short article dedicated to the passing of a corporate icon. Apparently, Canadian Tire has decided to retire the Canadian Tire Guy, on the grounds that he can no longer effectively connect with the public, particularly the youth demographic. The paper was unable to get any comments from the actor who plays Canadian Tire Guy, as he seems to have a no-interview clause within his soon to be terminated contract. You have to wonder whether this has anything to do with the job CTG was doing over at Precinct 13.

-The Daily Planet has another editorial from J. Jonah Jamieson complaining about the recent actions of so-called 'heroes' and 'vigilantes'. Jamieson condemns such meddlers as nothing more than criminals, and calls once again for the police to arrest any who would usurp their authority.

-The business section has a short article on a new company that has just bought up all the offices in one of Cormus' most prestigious high-rises. The company calls itself Elysium Incorporated, and seems to deal mostly with computer software and consulting. Despite these ambitious office arrangements, experts in the field seem unfamiliar with this company, and claim that it simply didn't exist more than five days ago.

Mysteries:

-You've got another job offer. This time, it's been extended by Ricky Tan, the extremely wealthy Warchon businessman who makes his home in Cormus. He's planning a big party later this evening to celebrate his promotion to CEO of the Warchon Wok corporation, and he wants to ensure that there will be no disturbances during the event. After recent incidents, he seems reluctant to entrust the police with such a task. You've scheduled a lunch meeting with him to discuss further details of the case.

Personal Notes:

-Saavik's betrayel may have been a surprise to some, but it was completely elementary to your observant eye. She had been acting odd and unstable ever since the incident in Domremy, so you're not at all surprised that she would fly off at the handle. Hysterical dames often pull just this sort of tactic, and it's something private detectives like yourself have to be watchful for.

-Mycroft Holmes is no more qualified to be mayor of this city than his brother – in other words, not at all! Two months of his rule is far too long, and gives him plenty of time to mess up all of Cormus. You've got to do everything in your power to make him drop the writ, and the sooner the better.

Mini-Objective:

-Help ensure that Ricky Tan's evening party runs smoothly.

-Persuade Mycroft Holmes to push forward the date of an election.

Saavik – Forensic Investigator 9

Recent Duties: Five days. It has been over for five days. Five days since you finally closed the door on the chapter that was your tortured past. Only now do you understand that you can never make it disappear entirely, no matter how far down you push your emotions. But at least Devastator, the catalyst of your destruction, is gone at last. Your fellow officers do not seem to comprehend the response he provoked in you. You cannot blame them; your actions were clearly against their procedures, and it is only through their charity that you remain free to this day. Of course, you were immediately suspended from active duty. However, the police commission believed you were not a flight risk, and allowed you to retain your freedom until your case comes before the courts.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' election.)

-The election is over for now, but this is only a temporary respite from the campaign trail. Under intense pressure, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has consented to call another election within the next two months. In the meantime, he has taken up office at city hall surrounded by an entourage of staunch police officers provided by Scotland Yard. Security is obviously a major concern for the new mayor, and he is currently accepting appointments with only the most important visitors. Thankfully, he has yet to impose any sort of dress code on said visitors.

Tech Report:

-The spam email you have received of late seem entirely trivial next to your current difficulties. You certaily do not have the time to order watches online at the moment, especially of the analogue variety. Besides, it would be totally illogical to choose a timepiece based on its aesthetic appeal rather than its functionality.

Tricorder Analysis:

-Your access to the equipment depot has been cut off, in addition to your permissions within the police computer systems. As such, the only analysis you've been able to perform has been on your own defense statement. [It would be reproduced below, but I'm trying to save webspace.]

Impersonal Notes:

-It has also been five days since you last saw Valeris. Still, you can feel her pain. You share it. After so long, you expected Devastator's death to feel satisfying, or at the least that it would leave you feeling numb. Instead, you feel ruined. Only now do you understand that it will take far more than revenge to cauterize the wounds that have burned deep into your very soul. You will have to start redeeming yourself by defending your actions. You will argue for yourself by their legal system. But should they still find your crimes terrible enough that you cannot be exonerated, you will begin your penance willingly.

-Of course, you intend to abide by the rules of your suspension. On the other hand, your first duty remains to the justice that your job upholds; you will not stand idle while crimes are being committed. After all, Dr. Watson is often able to participate in missions, despite being only a private citizen. It would be illogical for you to do any less.

Mini-Objective:

-Defend your actions during the battle with the Devastator.

-Seek guidance from Cardinal Callistus.

Jackie - Agent's Report 21

Recent Duties: The battle with Devastator and his Constructicons was five days ago, and the city streets still show the scars sustained during the battle. Most of them were due to the massive construction vehicles piloted by the Constructicons, but a few were the result of your crazy taxi. You wouldn't normally try to crash taxis into your opponents, but when they start playing rough, it's no more Mr. Nice Guy. You intend to do the same to whoever was responsible for kidnapping Arriko.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' election.)

-The election is over for now, but this is only a temporary respite from the campaign trail. Under intense pressure, Mayor Mycroft Holmes has consented to call another election within the next two months. In the meantime, he has taken up office at city hall surrounded by an entourage of staunch police officers provided by Scotland Yard. Security is obviously a major concern for the new mayor, and he is currently accepting appointments with only the most important visitors. Thankfully, he has yet to impose any sort of dress code on said visitors.

Wokking the Streets:

-It didn't take long for the IBI to investigate the finances behind the Heaven & Earth massage parlour, and their conclusion shocked you. It turns out that the place is fully funded and privately owned by Ricky Tan himself. Maybe Chris Tucker was onto something after all. You can hardly believe that your friend Ricky Tan could be behind such a thing, both because he's been so helpful and because it would mean that 7-11 would have bragging rights, and you'd never hear the end of it.

-In related news, Koizumi Li has grown so discouraged by the lack of progress on this case that he has decided to step down from his position so that he can devote more energy towards the search for his daughter. As expected, the company's board of directors wasted no time in appointing Ricky Tan as the new galactic CEO of Warchon Wok.

Classified Information:

-There is a lot of gossip about the mysterious informant who tipped police off to the most recent Constructicon plots. Of course, you've acted on information received from Rhadamanthys before, but back then his involvement was meant to be strictly confidential. This time, he didn't seem at all concerned about whether his annonymity would be preserved. In fact, you heard he's started up some computer company in downtown Cormus.

Personal Notes:

-Not surprisingly, Ricky Tan is planning a large party at his manor this evening to celebrate his recent promotion. All of the city's most prominent citizens are expected to attend, including Mayor Mycroft Holmes. This should provide a perfect opportunity to sneak onto Ricky Tan's estate. You're not sure what you expect to find in the manor, but the left by Arriko's kidnapping seems to lead quite literally right onto Ricky Tan's doorstep. Chris Tucker has been waiting for this opportunity for a long time, and is eager to accompany you on this stealthy mission. Maybe he can serve as a useful distraction, or something.

-Thanks to your supervision, and the physical labor provided by the City People, SOLD OUT is back in action. In fact, the City People concert proved so effective in drawing random people to the store that Mr. Tanegawa has considered bringing them on as full employees. But not paying them as such. Sort of like the way you were treated while working there. Come to think of it, you're not really sure if he actually understands the business world at all.

Mini-Objective:

-Sneak into Ricky Tan's mansion during the party and search for clues regarding Arriko's whereabouts.

“Yes! That is what makes him so arrogant. And he has even been aided by the police in the past. He must not be allowed in. You must stop him at all costs...”

The adventure began for the rest of the cops much less dramatically. They were eating at Monk's and commenting on the higher prices that apparently only Saavik, sitting shunned by herself at a nearby table, would have to pay. Not surprisingly, everyone wanted in on Ricky Tan's party, with the exception of Wheatie who wanted to send Nicholas Chesterly instead.

Wheatie was mainly concerned with plea-bargaining with Saavik in a particularly boring manner, namely in that no one else was allowed to see it. This basically involved letting her off with absolutely nothing, aside from a curfew that she could violate with the slightest excuse, such as the dubious authority of Dr. Wagner.

Jackie and Neji then made plans to slip into the party. Saavik had plans of her own and they involved conning a van out of the Bunsmaster Bakery to deliver pastries to the event.

However, she wouldn't find it quite so easy to slip past the observant security of Dr. Watson. This was even in spite of a distraction caused by “El Capitan,” otherwise known as Chris Tucker who was pretending to have bought Ricky Tan's house. Both were turned away at the door, unlike Neji who seemed to have obtained a legitimate invitation from Mr. Izael. Jackie also managed to sneak in inside a snake-like Chinese dragon.

Inside the manor, both Watson and Neji had a discussion with Mycroft Holmes, newly elected mayor of Cormus. Watson wanted to convince the mayor a rapid election was in his strategic interest, while Neji of course just wanted to ensure the survival of her silly dodgeball league. Watson's duties soon drew him away from the conversation, as several miscreants had decided to make their way into the manor via stealth rather than guile. Saavik was captured on the doorstep of the manor and although Chris Tucker was not caught, he did not manage to make it inside.

Jackie, however, had and was searching the basement where he encountered Miho, the female Warchon assassin. Her swift defeat ensued at Jackie's passionate hands, and he demanded she tell him the location of what he was looking for. This turned out to be a kidnapped Warchon girl, who he discovered trapped in a silver coffin on the top floor. However, his scuffle with two Terra-Cotta warriors attracted the attention of Watson, Neji, Saavik, Chris Tucker and Ricky Tan.

As Jackie convinced the cops of the truth of his story, Ricky Tan promptly informed Dr. Watson they were no longer partners and stuffed a cherry grenade in the older man's mouth, which swiftly detonated. A swift knifing then took Watson out of the picture, seemingly permanently. Meanwhile, Jackie was taking out the Terra-Cotta warriors in spite of their status as priceless artefacts. Ricky Tan used his laptop to restore his energies, but was forced to put it away as Chris Tucker came after it in a stomping rage. In the end, Tan was no match for the cops and was sent tumbling out the window onto the spikes of his garden fence.

No sooner was the battle over than the cops of course received a call to action from Inspector Valtyrez. Chris Tucker agreed to take Ariko, the rescued Warchon girl, back to Jackie's appartment. The cops meanwhile would head to Elysium Industries where a break-and-enter was said to be in the process of occurring.

Meeting with Wheatie at the scene, local security informed them they believed the intruder to still be on the top floor of the building. However, the rooms of the corporate headquarters were quite elaborate, and offered all sorts of devious places to hide a cunning Lego figure. However in the end in spite of deception on the part of many of the cops, it eventually became clear that the intruder was headed for the CEO's office.

In rushed the cops, where they found both Saavik and the Midnight Gaidin, the latter of whom was confronting the company's CEO, Rhadamanthys. The superhero did not believe in exoneration and declared it was time for Rhadamanthys to pay for his crimes. Rhadamanthys for his part demanded that the cops do their job and stop the intruder. “Are you cops or are you heroes?” the Gaidin demanded as he took a mighty swing at his target, but Rhadamanthys disappeared in a flash of blue light and flew to the other side of the room.

Some of the cops remained indecisive, but Jackie lept to the attack, striking at the Gaidin with his fists. Rhadamanthys fled the room and held the door shut as the Gaidin tried to ram it down. When it became clear the vigilante would not stop until Rhadamanthys was dead or he was, Watson declared he could not let either man die and would have to stop the Gaidin. The other cops came onboard and joined in the battle to subdue the Gaidin. Although he defeated Jackie and Neji, the Gaidin was soon brought to his knees by the other cops. Rhadamanthys re-entered the room, but the stubborn super-hero would not surrender. This could only please Rhadamanthys, who produced a cyber-spear to finish the job. However, first Wheatie and then Saavik uncharacteristically but heroically threw themselves in the way, knocking the Gaidin aside and rendering him unconscious while they took the spear themselves. Watson could only remark that Rhadamanthys must have missed. With that, the Gaidin's mask was tipped aside to reveal the face of Telris Izael, to the surprise of absolutely no one.

With the Gaidin defeated, the scene shifted to much later, where Jackie was saying goodbye to Ariko at the space-port as her father came to pick her up. Although the family was grateful, Agent Russ from the IBI was not and informed Jackie that he was fired for using IBI resources to pursue a personal objective.

Meanwhile, back in his office, a smarmy Rhadamanthys spoke on the phone to a mysterious partner and informed him that although the Midnight Gaidin had unfortunately survived, it would not be difficult to take him out of the way. The unsettling sight of Rhadamanthys' INCREDIBLY EVIL glowing blue eyes that ought to be cause enough for arrest marked an end to the second season of COPS. The thin blue line had been drawn, the question is now who will be able to walk it?

Note: Special thanks to Dr. John Watson for writing this summary.

None.