Neji – Beat Cop's Report 29

Recent Duties: Three days have passed since the arrest of Mayor Don Atchison and police commissioner NORG. It appears that the mayor was a man of many vices, pizza and corruption being among them. His sins landed him in prison, leaving you only to hope that the Cormus International Dodgeball League of Cormus enjoys a better fate. It would be a shame if Don Atchison's sole contribution to the welfare of the city went down with him.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)

-Once again, the race towards the mayor's seat has taken a stunning turn. The arrest of incumbent Don Atchison would surely have generated even more controversy had the public not still been numb from the sudden demise of Mr. Riven and his Cormus Party. On the dawn of election day, voters suddenly find themselves with only two choices, both candidates who had been considered long-shots from the very beginning by anyone with any political acumen. Now pundits are scrambling to make sense of this situation, and to analyse the two candidates that they previously hadn't traken seriously. Support seems generally divided along class lines, with the lower class tending to favor Andrew Shuba's down-to-earth policies, while the city's more upright citizens seem predisposed towards Mycroft's aristocratic leanings. Only time will tell which of these two will pave and walk the path to success.

Divine Rumblings:

-You rather suspected that the death of Mr. Riven could not have been the work of Sarpedon's followers, simply because you felt no tremors of darkness within your katra. However, that very feeling has been growing exponentially over the past couple days. The shadow still looms over the city, and the time to confront it may soon be at hand.

Personal Notes:

-You have always believed in doing your duty, be it to your faith or to the people who count on you for protection. As such, you feel compelled to do your civic duty in this election by casting a ballot for the most worthy candidate. Neither of the two remaning candidates have much in their platforms about fitness, but at least Andrew Shuba is promoting exercise through his sidewalk policy. Besides, Mycroft Holmes has often argued for the separation between church and state, a notion you find reprehensible. After all, you have never found a conflict in combining religion with crime fighting.

-The regular dodgeball season has begun at last. Your first game was last night, and your team ended up scoring a major victory, despite attempts by several of your team mates to dodge the game itself. Your match against The Red Pill didn't last long; Reeves might normally be able to dodge bullets, but not while still recovering from the wounds Rambo inflicted on him. In fact, he made only a couple attempts to rise from his stretcher, and that was only before Jackie wailed him with a ball to the face. He should have taken the blue pill instead.

Team I.Q. (1-0) vs The Red Pill (0-1) – Team I.Q.

The Bad Dudes (1-0) vs Divine Dodgers (0-1) – The Bad Dudes.

7-11 Closers (0-1) vs Point Blank RIFLES (1-0) – Point Blank Rifles.

Raging Butterflies (0-1) vs The Bloody Wrenches (1-0)–The Bloody Wrenches.

Mini-Objective:

-Do all you can to assist in the election of Andrew Shuba.

Wheatie – Legal Assistant's Report 30

Recent Duties: It's been three days since the arrest of Mayor Don Atchison and police commissioner NORG. Perhaps unsurprisingly, there are all sorts of neat legal remifications that go along with arresting such high profile suspects, including impeaching them from their current positions and appointing interim officials. On the other hand, you're not sure what will become of your actual internship, now that your supervisor has been incarcerated. Still, all of these concerns haven't been enough to sidetrack your anticipation for the big election. Voting day has arrived at last, and you're totally ready to exercise your democratic rights.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)

-Once again, the race towards the mayor's seat has taken a stunning turn. The arrest of incumbent Don Atchison would surely have generated even more controversy had the public not still been numb from the sudden demise of Mr. Riven and his Cormus Party. On the dawn of election day, voters suddenly find themselves with only two choices, both candidates who had been considered long-shots from the very beginning by anyone with any political acumen. Now pundits are scrambling to make sense of this situation, and to analyse the two candidates that they previously hadn't traken seriously. Support seems generally divided along class lines, with the lower class tending to favor Andrew Shuba's down-to-earth policies, while the city's more upright citizens seem predisposed towards Mycroft's aristocratic leanings. Only time will tell which of these two will pave and walk the path to success.

Book Report:

-Mycroft Holmes has written a couple books, mostly dealing with politics and interplanetary relations. The one you got from the library includes a cover boldly engraved with his last name, while his first is depicted only in tiny font. This shameless advertising is made all the more blatant by the first chapter of the book, which mostly contends that Mycroft has no real relation to his more famous brother.

Personal Notes:

-Unfortunately, your return to your regular duties also involved your reinstatement with the dodgeball team. You tried to argue that your departure to Atch & Co. represented a severing of all ties, thus exempting you from Team I.Q., but Neji made you play all the same. Fortunately, your first match was against the team captained by the bedridden Inspector Keanu Reeves, so you were able to win without really doing anything. Nicholas Chesterly also seemed very grateful for this bracketing, although he still seems to be really paranoid as of late.

-You were never a big Atch supporter, and your time working at Atch & Co. certainly didn't change your opinion for the better. You've never really understood the preppy business type, and it was all you could do to maintain your persona as 'Kent', especially while recommending such ridiculously smarmy clothing.

-As an informed voter, you've been studying up on the profiles of the two remaining candidates. Shub's focus rests squarely on a foundation of sidewalk renewal, while Mycroft seems geared towards more than just one issue. Given your rural roots, you've never really understood the need for so many sidewalks. Especially now that you can fly. Really, it seems that Mycroft Holmes is the only sensible choice.

Mini-Objective:

-Encourage support for the election of Mycroft Holmes as the next mayor of Cormus.

John Watson – Crime Doctor 25

Recent Duties: It was three days ago that you closed the case on Mayor Don Atchison. Figuring out his whole only took you a few atchiseconds, and the rest was a matter of convincing Inspector Lestrade and the other typically sceptical officers of the law. All the same, you're sure the credit for this arrest will somehow end up following to Holmes. And with the vote being held today, such a notion becomes particularly perilous. The thought of Mycroft's campaign somehow profiting from your success is extremely galling.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)

-Once again, the race towards the mayor's seat has taken a stunning turn. The arrest of incumbent Don Atchison would surely have generated even more controversy had the public not still been numb from the sudden demise of Mr. Riven and his Cormus Party. On the dawn of election day, voters suddenly find themselves with only two choices, both candidates who had been considered long-shots from the very beginning by anyone with any political acumen. Now pundits are scrambling to make sense of this situation, and to analyse the two candidates that they previously hadn't traken seriously. Support seems generally divided along class lines, with the lower class tending to favor Andrew Shuba's down-to-earth policies, while the city's more upright citizens seem predisposed towards Mycroft's aristocratic leanings. Only time will tell which of these two will pave and walk the path to success.

Newspaper Headlines:

-The most recent edition of the Daily Planet included a large package devoted to today's election. It offers analysis of all sorts, although none of the authors claim to be unbiased, least of all J. Jonah Jamieson who penned the editorial personally. Once again, he seems to be complaining about the interferance of independent elements within the policing of 'his' city. This editorial is backed up by Scaevoli's cutting expose of the current state of policing within Cormus. He not only makes mention of the corruption within the police commission, but also alleges incompetence in the handling of ED-209 and negligence with regard to recent security breaches within the police databases. The latter information has not yet been released by police, so it seems that once again Scaevoli has managed to dig up an inside source.

Mysteries:

-Atch's plan to dome the city's downtown was always a bit of a mystery in its own right, especially in regards to what purpose it would actually serve. But it's even more mysterious that construction on it would continue even after the mayor's arrest. In your experience, most construction workers would use just about any excuse to take a few days off work, but the ones working on the dome seem unusually diligent.

Personal Notes:

-It seems your medical woes aren't quite over yet. This morning's post contained a letter from the Cormus Medical Association, informing you that your medical license had once again been revoked. You're not sure what could cause such a misunderstanding, but the forms appear to be signed by one Dr. Doom. How apt. Fortunately, the only thing you intend to diagnose over the next few days is crime.

Mini-Objective:

-Take every opportunity to discredit Mycroft Holmes.

Saavik – Forensic Investigator 7

Recent Duties: It has been three days since you assisted in the arrest of Mayor Don Atchison and police commissioner NORG. Some of your colleagues might have been shocked to find corruption amongst even the highest officials, but it hardly caused you to raise an eyebrow. All the same, you do not quite understand how Mr. Atchison expected his crimes to go unnoticed. Most illogical.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)

-Once again, the race towards the mayor's seat has taken a stunning turn. The arrest of incumbent Don Atchison would surely have generated even more controversy had the public not still been numb from the sudden demise of Mr. Riven and his Cormus Party. On the dawn of election day, voters suddenly find themselves with only two choices, both candidates who had been considered long-shots from the very beginning by anyone with any political acumen. Now pundits are scrambling to make sense of this situation, and to analyse the two candidates that they previously hadn't traken seriously. Support seems generally divided along class lines, with the lower class tending to favor Andrew Shuba's down-to-earth policies, while the city's more upright citizens seem predisposed towards Mycroft's aristocratic leanings. Only time will tell which of these two will pave and walk the path to success.

Tech Report:

-You have not received any noteworthy email messages within the last three days. Each of the accounts you monitor did receive a message ostensibly from a Chalcakian banker with poor spelling and a large fortune that requires your assistance to be transported off the planet. You find it highly illogical that someone without the knowledge necessary to turn off the caps lock would be entrusted with such a sum.

Tricorder Analysis:

-The police's cyber crimes unit has been investigating the breach into the police database systems, but without much success. They have yet to even figure out which files have been modified. A backup of the database does exist, but synchronizing it into use will not occur earlier than this evening. In the interim, you are still responsible for investigating this matter.

Impersonal Notes:

-Today is the Cormus general election. You are mostly ambivalent towards this event. Like so much in this galaxy, it seems to defy any logical explaination. Furthermore, the pomp and circumstance surrounding this impractical process seems like a blatant attempt to cloud reason with emotion. What other explaination could there be for lines of adjacent identical posters? In addition, the information contained on these posters seems almost entirely irrelevant for the position in question. The system could surely be improved if such fallacies were corrected.

Mini-Objective:

-Question the lapese in logic clearly present in this election campaign.

-Investigate the security breach with the police database system.

Jackie - Agent's Report 19

Recent Duties: It has been three days since you SOLD OUT Don Atchison and sent him to prison. He was not just a criminal, but also a racist, so he deserved this punishment and more. With Atch behind bars, Cormus should be a safer place for all of its ethnic minority citizens. Plus, SOLD OUT will have a better chance to compete with Atch & Co. Whether it greedy mayors, corrupt police commissioners or pizza bosses, Jackie bring you the best in law enforcement.

Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)

-Once again, the race towards the mayor's seat has taken a stunning turn. The arrest of incumbent Don Atchison would surely have generated even more controversy had the public not still been numb from the sudden demise of Mr. Riven and his Cormus Party. On the dawn of election day, voters suddenly find themselves with only two choices, both candidates who had been considered long-shots from the very beginning by anyone with any political acumen. Now pundits are scrambling to make sense of this situation, and to analyse the two candidates that they previously hadn't traken seriously. Support seems generally divided along class lines, with the lower class tending to favor Andrew Shuba's down-to-earth policies, while the city's more upright citizens seem predisposed towards Mycroft's aristocratic leanings. Only time will tell which of these two will pave and walk the path to success.

Classified Information:

-It seems like the cop killer has struck again. This time the victim was one of Precinct 14's more experienced and dramatic officers. Hamlet's body was discovered this morning in the back of a theater he often frequented. It's estimated that he was messily killed late last night. The method of death is consistent with the other work attributed to this serial murderer. Of note is the fact that Hamlet was apparently armed both with his long sword and a skull at the time of his demise. Apparently, neither did him much good.

Personal Notes:

-Today is the Cormus election, and people all over have been telling you to vote. You're not sure why it's such a big deal. Demoracies seem like a terrible form of government. In your opinion, trial by combat seems like a much better way to choose a leader. As far as you're concerned, voter apathy is not a problem but a sign that some people recognise the flaws in this system of government. If only more people would puit aside their ballots and choose a more effective command structure. Perhaps the persuasion skills you picked up at SOLD OUT will help you convince others to do just that.

-These Deksiilan sports are strange. Your dodgeball team had their first league game last night, and it felt to you just like a day on the job: you were always frantically trying to dodge things, shouting in a very coherent manner all the while. The opposing team was led by Inspector Reeves, who is still bedridden thanks to the wounds he received from Rambo. Reeves tried to rise a couple times, but you made sure he stayed down with a couple good hits from a ball. That game is kind of fun, actually.

Mini-Objective:

-Discourage people from voting and participating in such a faulty system of government.

A surprisingly 'w33t-filled' and 'pro-Wheatie' adventure!

Nicholas Chesterly and the PCs gathered in Monk's cafe (sans Watson, who was at some sort of Kendo tournament banquet). Discussion was had over the correct choice for the voters from the decidedly shallow pool of mayoral candidates. Jackie was pro-apathy (due to the inefficacy of the democratic system), Saavik was pro-abstention (because there was no good choice, and voting for one of the two remaining was clearly illogical), Neji was pro-Shuba (why? I'm not sure… sidewalks = physical fitness?), and Wheatie was pro-Mycroft (the correct choice for intellectual people). Arguments and character development ensued. As per usual, this soon translated into mini-objective time.

The 3 coolest PCs (ouch) participated in a mini-game. Neji, Wheatie, and Jackie campaigned for their respective platforms in various districts (precincts) of the city. Many different tactics could be utilized: waving, candy, loud conversation, and posters. The key was to figure out which precincts had the most apathetic people (for Wheatie and Neji) or the most non-apathetic people (Jackie) in them and then pick the move that would work the best on them. Since we had almost no information about some of the precincts, wild assumptions were made, leading us to believe that certain precincts were full of insane people (i.e. the only location we knew of there was the asylum) and others were voids of nothingness. Highlights include Jackie waving to the chief, Neji insulting the French by mocking their accent, and Wheatie + Nicholas handing out candy at the university but (having failed the check) saying 'Sorry, it's actually just Dubble Bubble”. We later found out that Wheatie somehow lost this game (despite making 100% clever decisions, he rolled under 20 at least 80% of the time).

Saavik was busy trying to figure out who had hacked into the police database (a decidedly tough mini-objective). Conversations were had, but information was scarce. She did eventually find out that Sarpedon's file had been modified, but did not know how it changed or why. As the PCs received a copy of the altered background, Neji whipped out the 'real' background she had from before and remarked “why is THAT changed?” Whatever. She's clearly a wench. As such, Saavik was not able to participate in the fun and games that is last minute election campaigning.

It was then time to vote… *vote*

Time passed, and we came a scene montage of our heroes at their respective homes (well, Jackie was at the station, babbling on about nothing to the chief) awaiting the announcement of the election results from SCTV news. And so the results came in… 49.9% for Holmes, 50.1% for Shuba (i.e. a single die roll in the mini-game). Only 1/50th of one precinct would have had to vote differently to change the results. Poor Wheatie. After an in-depth analysis of the results and a televised speech by Shuba, we returned for a comprehensive review of dog-owners and their voting patterns by Earl Cammembert (also, smarmy Watson returns from said tournament and receives an easy mini-objective… I don't even know what it was). But then, the dog report was interrupted by an attack from The Mouth, some black riders and another guy in a black cloak with a red eye on it who is 'clearly' the resurrected Sarpedon. The camera went black… Earl Cammembert manages to survive.

The Chief called his favorite suckahs to try and figure out where the shadow would strike next. Watson appeared somehow. Jackie finally got to say what he had been trying to say to the Chief all this time. Something in his report (clearly since the rest of us hadn't figured it out, there's no way he could have) must have tipped him off as to the reason behind The Mouth's murders. By analyzing previous reports, Jackie discovered that the cop killer (The Mouth) had not been killing randomly, but had been choosing his targets very carefully. The 3 corpses mutilated in the last couple of months belonged to Owl, Irvine, and Hamlet, each a part of the assassination team that took out Sarpedon. This gave the PCs a place to start. They contacted the other members of the strike team, thinking that The Mouth and his posse would be after one of them. John McGuire and Callistus were both fine, but there was no answer from Boromir, so they headed over to his house on Gondor Avenue (which was coincidentally located in the insane precinct).

Getting no answer at the door, our heroes entered the fortress, and inside found a grim and spooky atmosphere. Wheatie kept turning on lights to break the tension, which angered the GM. In the 'living' room, we found Boromir lying on a bundle of sticks that was… not on fire. Watson woke him up and then Boromir said “I kill you now” and some guys with guns jumped out of the closets. Clearly, Boromir had SOLD OUT to the shadow, and for some reason, was going to torch himself. Nicholas Chesterly led the PCs into battle and victory was had (although PK-97s caused wicked hurting). Also, Boromir took forever to kill because of his super cheap move 'kneel and bow' which essentially made him immortal as long as we weren't attacking him with bows. As he lay dying, he SOLD OUT again to us, and gave up important information… the shadow was planning to take over the city that night by attacking key locations: the university, the prison, Cyberdine, and downtown. The police force SPRUNG INTO ACTION!!!! BOOYEAH!

Units from all over formed an unstoppable and awesome force: K-9s, beat cops, undercover agents, Cyberdine security, mounties, the KGB, the Surete, campus security, etc… led by various inspectors… and the PCs… which spread amongst the locations like pesticide amongst a crop of sorghum. Highlights include campus security being invincible, Southrons being slaughtered, and special candy being fed to the K-9s. During the fight, the chief found it puzzling that Amphion and her eagles of justice had not shown up… so Wheatie was sent to investigate. After an explosion rocked the building as soon as he landed on it, he entered to find the dead bodies of pilots and shadow forces everywhere, Amphion appearing to be the only survivor. All of the helicopters had been blown up, except for one that they took and one that was being repaired, so Wheatie and Amphion headed downstairs to see if they could get it running. Unfortunately, The Mouth was waiting for them. Amphion decided not to participate and left Wheatie to fend for himself. One moon attack and one energy blade later, The Mouth was down (I was surprised too!) but he flew off before I could kill him. Jerk. Wheatie and Amphion took off, but actually, I don't think we ever got to use the helicopter… oh well.

The downtown fight finally got going when a helicopter flew overhead (presumably the stolen one and not the one Wheatie and Amphion were in, but that was never confirmed) and crashed into the church [Somewhat confirmed by Wheatie and Amphion being perfectly fine later.]. Saavik, Lestrade, and Giraud were unable to slow down the helicopter but soon had bigger problems on their hands as The Mouth reappeared, commanding an Olliphant (gasp) with backup forces. As things began to look grim, Valtyrez and his crusaders emerged from the church rubble and CRUSHED the remaining forces (seriously, he could have taken every front by himself since he had such high damage reduction). However, it would appear that some of the shadow forces snuck (spell check says this is wrong, but 'sneaked' sounds so stupid [Spell check is stupid, unless it's my amazing editing.]) into city hall when we weren't looking so the PCs were dispatched once again to take care of business.

Oh yeah, also, at some point, Precinct 13 got attacked and The Chief was sent to the hospital. Kojack was then in charge, and was involved with one of the fights at some time... OH YEAH!!! He picked up all the PCs except for Wheatie in his car, and then crashed it through the front of city hall! I forgot about that, I was just distracted by all of Wheatie's coolness.

Inside, we found a scene of slaughter, as many city clerks had been brutally slain. In the midst was a battered Miss Vayl who had survived. Jokes were made about Miss Vayl's secret high level-ness, but there was no time for laughter and the PCs pressed on to the mayor's office to see if Shuba was okay. Turned out, he had barricaded himself in his office and although someone had attacked the door, they were not able to get through. We were about to escort him outside, when the hooded figure from the TV station appeared in front of us. We all waited for him to unmask himself since we knew it SO wasn't Sarpedon… it was Scaevoli! That jerk! He said something about his real name being (and since I don't know how to spell it, I'll give you many possible spellings) Rizane/Rezane/Rizain/Rezain/Rissane/Ressane/Resain/Resane etc [Rezane]. This caused Neji to say 'What? But you're dead!' and the rest of us to go 'bwa?' (clearly, the omitted information in Sarpedon's background check included something about this character).

Anyway, we had to fight him. Shuba was safely put back in the mayor's office with Vayl, knowing that if something did happen, Vayl could clearly use her art and brawl 100 to defend him. Scaevoli used the Will and Strength of Sarpedon to smack us down with moon attacks and flaming attack flurries. Things looked really bad, and as they looked even worse, we heard a scream from the mayor's office… So Miss Vayl WAS evil! She IS high level! Shuba was dead, and Vayl joined the fight on the wrong side, preferring to attack with her tazer, even though she had psychics. With only a couple PCs (i.e. Wheatie) still up, we really needed Valtyrez to save us, which he did. His powers were almost enough to beat the jerks, but it looked like even he would go down. Luckily, Wheatie had regained conciousness at 0, snuck into the mayor's office, used a medkit, used his spirit and drama award (to restore PP), and killed (yes, killed) Scaevoli with a psi-bolt. He also moon attacked Vayl, even though she was surrendering. Take that bizotch! And thus the adventure ends, the PCs still pondering why the GM thought this would be a short one [Heh].

To clear things up, Vayl was Scaevoli's inside informant (why he always knew what the police were up to) and she was also the one to hack into the police database. Why either of them were evil is still a mystery to me… something about being 'converted' to the Sarpedon cult and thereby following him and completing intricate plots to help him.

Why was this a w33t-filled adventure? Well, Wheatie spent about 200 PP (doing massive amounts of damage), despite having a max of roughly half that, beat up The Mouth by himself, by default became the new DA for Precinct 13, and had his favorite candidate end up mayor by default. Truly a 'pro-Wheatie' adventure, although he didn't pwn for experience this time, since Neji and Jackie apparently did better in the campaigning minigame…

Also, there was chart… with predictions (how many adventures left in season 2, end boss of season 2, and faction which the campaign boss belongs to)… except we don't know who won or how it was marked. Whatev!

Note: Special thanks to Wheatie for writing this summary.

Inspector Odie
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Precinct 16
Inspector Odie has served with the police department's K-9 unit since its inception several years ago. While not known for his investigative brillance, Odie is reputed to have an uncanny ability to relate with canines of all sorts. This is possibly because he carries candy with him at all times, and is willing to give each playful dog under his charge a whole piece of their very own. Like his personality, Odie's appearance has often been compared to the dogs he leads. It includes a shaggy black mustache, long tufts of hair falling to his shoulders and a police uniform that is absolutely covered with dog hair. This does not necessarily inspire confidence in Odie's colleagues, but his ready enthusiasm and tireless determination make him a valuable addition to the force.