Neji – Beat Cop's Report 24
Recent Duties: Three days have passed since the raid on Hans Island and the death of Inspector Rambo. It looks like the Chief was right to question the loyalty of your fellow officers. This once again demonstrates that even those charged with upholding the law are not beyond the lure of evil temptation. You'll have to be on your guard for any more signs of corruption within the police force.
Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)
-Mayor Don Atchison continues to preach his hardline policies on crime in several recent media interviews. In doing so, he has made numerous references to the police operation on Hans Island. Evidence related to the United Underworld continues to be extracted by investigators on the scene, and Atch has used this progress to bolster his policing platform. Reaction polls indicate that this strategy seems to be working, despite allegations of excessive force levelled against the police by human rights groups around the city. This issue is sure to be discussed further at the next election forum, which will be held in a couple days as part of Precinct 17's Guy Fawkes celebrations.
The Street Beat:
-Word on the street also involves the upcoming election, and mostly focuses on Mayor Don Atchison. It's not surprising that he's the talk of the streets, especially considering how much he apparently spends waving from them. Atch does not seem to go door to door so much as from corner to corner. You find it hard to believe that this could be the most efficient use of his time, but then you still don't really understand how politics work here on this planet.
Personal Notes:
-Inspector Rambo's demise is not just a big blow to Precinct 13, but also to the Cormus International Dodgeball League of Cormus. Rambo was slated to captain one of the teams, and with pre-season play set to start in only a few days, there's not much time to find a replacement. Rather than dodge this decision, you have decided to personally step into this leadership position of the Napalm Strikers. At the least, this should allow you to lead the league by example. Now you just have to come up with a team roster, and perhaps a new name as well.
-After much of your urging, the Chief finally granted you permission to contact the Church of Cormus regarding the recent actions of the Mouth. Your information was forwarded all the way up to Cardinal Callistus, who seemed to consider it very significant indeed.
Mini-Objective:
-Build an exemplary Dodgeball team that will do the league justice.
Wheatie – Legal Assistant's Report 25
Recent Duties: The three days since the defeat of Inspector Rambo have barely been enough time for you to recover from your injuries, or from your indignation. You're still not sure how you ended up getting sent on such a blatantly dangerous mission. They claimed you were being sent out there to deal with legal issues, but in fact you were little more than a punching bag for Sweyn Canute. Maybe it was all that silent heckling.
Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)
-Mayor Don Atchison continues to preach his hardline policies on crime in several recent media interviews. In doing so, he has made numerous references to the police operation on Hans Island. Evidence related to the United Underworld continues to be extracted by investigators on the scene, and Atch has used this progress to bolster his policing platform. Reaction polls indicate that this strategy seems to be working, despite allegations of excessive force levelled against the police by human rights groups around the city. This issue is sure to be discussed further at the next election forum, which will be held in a couple days as part of Precinct 17's Guy Fawkes celebrations.
Notes from Home:
-Unsurprisingly, your family wasn't too impressed with your adventures on Hans Island. They also didn't seem concerned about all the chemicals being dumped on the island during the operation, despite your attempts to convince them that these substances were a bit more potent than the harmless crop-dusting that goes on back home.
Legal Report:
-There weren't many arrests made on Hans Island. Most of the Danes were killed during the operation, including leaders such as Sweyn Canute and the Danish Brothers. Anwar has already filed a lawsuit of excessive force on behalf of the PFC, and Miss Vayl expects several other such charges will be laid before the end of the week.
Personal Notes:
-What's the deal with this Guy Fawkes day? Nicholas Chesterly claims it's some big British holiday that's coming up in a couple days. He says that the people of Precinct 17 consider it the most important day of the year. You're tempted to take this information with a grain of salt, especially since Nicholas apparently got this information from The Anthropologist. Nicholas should know better than to trust the likes of him. But that's not all! Nicholas also heard the Anthropologist mention something about a British Invasion, and that has you a little concerned. You witnessed a Danish major invasion on Hans Island, and you have no desire to repeat the experience. You'll have to get to the bottom of this before the Anthropologist tries to show you up again.
-The Precinct's newest officer, Saavik, seems to know her way around most devices. Especially that amazing tricorder she carries! You wouldn't mind trying it out yourself at some point. Anyway, it's about time they got another scientific person on the job. Science has always been one of your preferred subjects, particularly of the soil variety. Still, you wouldn't want to trust her with the legal department's photocopier. Photocopying is one of your favorite jobs, and you have the device set up with exactly the right settings.
Mini-Objective:
-Discover the historical background of this Guy Fawkes day and the truth about the so-called British Invasion.
John Watson – Crime Doctor 20
Recent Duties: Hallo! At last, things have been going well for the Crime Doctor. First, you were able to declare the Moriarty case closed, and then you were able to figuartively close the lid on Rambo's coffin, and just in the nick of time. The latter event occured three days ago, and has put you in a postively corking good spirits for the upcoming holidays, and you've instructed Mrs. Hudson to prepare her best pasties for the occaison.
Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)
-Mayor Don Atchison continues to preach his hardline policies on crime in several recent media interviews. In doing so, he has made numerous references to the police operation on Hans Island. Evidence related to the United Underworld continues to be extracted by investigators on the scene, and Atch has used this progress to bolster his policing platform. Reaction polls indicate that this strategy seems to be working, despite allegations of excessive force levelled against the police by human rights groups around the city. This issue is sure to be discussed further at the next election forum, which will be held in a couple days as part of Precinct 17's Guy Fawkes celebrations.
Newspaper Headlines:
-There's nothing more British than sipping tea over the morning paper, and that's exactly how you spent this morning. The paper in question was the London Guardian, and its top stories were all breathlessly anticipating the coming of Guy Fawkes day, Precinct 17's most important celebration. Foreigners might find it odd to celebrate a criminal who almost blew up Westminster Abbey, but they don't know what it's done for the tourist economy. The holiday also coincides with the unveiling of a major new collection of Electran artifacts at the British museum. This exhibition will be on loan from the Electran Empire for the next several months, and is said to contain several priceless artifacts such as a period briefcase of authentic constitutional documents dating back to the fall of the Electran Republic. The only other article in the paper deals with the metro delays that have resulted from the typcial pre-holiday bustle.
Mysteries:
-Scotland Yard is also bustling. Wiggins has reported that there seems to be a lot of activity at the moment, though you're not quite sure what those lads are up to. You'll have to keep an eye on the Yard to make sure they don't try to keep any cases from your ever-observant gaze.
Personal Notes:
-Your past actions regarding Union Jack and Roger Thornberry have left some members of the community questioning your patriotism. This blemish on your reputation cannot be allowed to stand. This holiday should present a good opportunity for you to disprove any such rubbish in the most proper of British fashions.
Mini-Objective:
-Demonstrate your national pride by deploying British expressions at every appropriate opportunity.
(Please keep an accurate list of the British slang you've used.)
Saavik – Forensic Investigator 2
Recent Duties: In just a few days of duty with the Cormus police force, you have already been involved in more violent confrontations than in any of your previous jobs. These combat situations are very different from the lab settings and simulations that you customarily encounter. Furthermore, one of the first criminals you have faced here on Deksiil turned out to be a fellow police officer, which might suggest why this city is so rife with crime. This also demonstrates the dangers of emotional judgements. Had Rambo and his comrades been rational, they would have realised that a tantine offers little more than an incentive for removing the other participants. It is really quite an illogical concept.
Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)
-Mayor Don Atchison continues to preach his hardline policies on crime in several recent media interviews. In doing so, he has made numerous references to the police operation on Hans Island. Evidence related to the United Underworld continues to be extracted by investigators on the scene, and Atch has used this progress to bolster his policing platform. Reaction polls indicate that this strategy seems to be working, despite allegations of excessive force levelled against the police by human rights groups around the city. This issue is sure to be discussed further at the next election forum, which will be held in a couple days as part of Precinct 17's Guy Fawkes celebrations.
Tech Report:
-If you allowed yourself to experience emotions, you would almost have to be relieved about Inspector Reeves' absence from the Precinct. Lacking your green blood, he is still recovering from wounds sustained on Hans Island, which means he has not been around to trouble you with trivial requests for assistance.
Tricorder Analysis:
-Attempts to determine the source of the Deep Throat audio tape have proven unsuccessful. The Chief has ordered that the tape be sent to the central police lab for analysis, in order to determine the identities of the speakers. You're confident that your tricorder could easily accomplish such a task, but given your current role it would be against procedure for you to perform such analysis.
Impersonal Notes:
-Many different ethnicities reside within Cormus, each with their own distinct idiosyncrasies and traditions, most of which tend to be devoid of any logic. Yet these pointless differences are often the cause of cultural tensions and discord. Aside from ritual meditation, your race has long abandoned such unnecessary practices. If only more people would be willing to do the same.
-The residents of Precinct 17 seem inappropriately excited by the approach of Guy Fawkes day, which is some sort of local celebration. Illogical traditions are often especially prevalant during such holidays, and as such it may prove the perfect opportunity to point out the futility in such cultural nuances, ranging from incomprehensible slang to inedible cuisine.
Mini-Objective:
-Demonstrate the lack of logic inherent in so many of these British traditions and expressions.
(Please keep an accurate list of your efforts in this regard.)
Jackie - Agent's Report 14
Recent Duties: The big fight against Rambo was three days ago, and you still haven't quite figured out why you had to take him out. You thought he was on your side! There was some talk about money or something, and then all of a sudden things were blowing up all over the place, and everyone was running frantically for the rapidly disappearing cover. The last thing you remember about that battle was your amazing superman charge, when you slammed into Rambo with the force reminiscent of a wind tunnel. It sort of felt like running into a brick wall, which is something you've also done before. By the time you woke up, it was all over. A few body casts later, you were back on the job.
Tidings from the Campaign Trail: (News regarding Cormus' coming election.)
-Mayor Don Atchison continues to preach his hardline policies on crime in several recent media interviews. In doing so, he has made numerous references to the police operation on Hans Island. Evidence related to the United Underworld continues to be extracted by investigators on the scene, and Atch has used this progress to bolster his policing platform. Reaction polls indicate that this strategy seems to be working, despite allegations of excessive force levelled against the police by human rights groups around the city. This issue is sure to be discussed further at the next election forum, which will be held in a couple days as part of Precinct 17's Guy Fawkes celebrations.
Classified Information:
-Guy Fawkes day is set to coincide with the opening of a new exhibition at the British Museum. This collection of rare artifacts is on loan from the Electran Empire, and contains some priceless works dating back to the end of the Electran Republic. A big ceremony is planned to kick off this exhibit, and Scotland Yard will be providing the security. They're obviously concerned about hosting such a high profile collection in the midst of the turbulant conditions within the city, and have requested additional resources from the police commission.
Personal Notes:
-That exhibit at the British Museum sounds like a huge target for the mysterious Juntao organization. This means that you and Chris Tucker will have to attend the event in order to protect the Empire's history and to find out more information about this mysterious crimelord. Unfortunately, the Deksiilan disguise you've already perfected won't work within Precinct 17. Going undercover at this event will require knowledge of British customs and culture. Chris Tucker claims to already have such experience, but he says you'll need some major practice in order to become the Shanghai Knight you'll need to be for this task.
Mini-Objective:
-Take on the guise of a Shanghai Knight.
Although people claim this adventure began before Wheatie's arrival, it, of course, didn't really begin until he got there, because he is the only cool PC and schools all (including Mr. T) [...]. Our readers will only care what happened to him.
Our hero bursts into Monk's diner to try and catch the good ol' gang there as he arrives late from his lunch with uncle Moose. Discussions about Guy Fawkes Day occur, as Wheatie is curious to learn more about this obscure British holiday. Saavik tells people how illogical they are, Neji convinces the other PCs + Nicholas to form the weakest dodgeball team ever, Watson drowns us in British slang, and Jackie tries to blend in with English culture. But seriously, no need to go into detail about non-Wheatie characters.
In the Chief's office, it's story time. Cardinal Callistus and Neji sit cross-legged on the floor, lost in the Chief's liquid, flowing voice (Damnit Wheatie! No they weren't!). This translates into a flashback, where our hero and his associates don new personalities. Our protagonist becomes Borromir! He is joined by Hamlet, Young John McGuire, Irvine, and Agent Smith. This unlikely posse is being sent out by General Leo with a strike team of many nameless NPCs to arrest Sarpedon, the evil criminal mastermind (and so everyone knows, his name was uttered by Strider as we killed him ages ago but was not included in the report and it is clear that whenever the Mouth refers to 'he', it means this Sarpedon). Off they go to his smarmy castle.
Some lazy sniping by Irvine occurs (under the guidance of gratuitous NPC: Owl). Borromir leads the charge over the wall and they secure the area on the other side. A trivial battle occurs as they take out some guards, victory being assured by Borromir's incredible slash fests and the encouraging sounds of the horn of Gondor. As the battle ends, so does the crazy dream sequence, the PCs sure to return to it at a later time.
A case is now afoot, sure to be solved by Wheatie. The PCs go to help Scotland Yard catch the elusive Mr. X just in time for the Guy Fawkes Day festivities. This is when Watson actually joins them, and tea time is had, Wheatie learning slightly more about Guy Fawkes day, and nothing more about a 'British Invasion' the Anthropologist has been spouting off about. After we fix Lestrade's tea machine, he gives us some special Precinct 17 police equipment, which allow us to use and manipulate public transportation.
So we play a slightly modified version of 'Scotland Yard'TM the board game, with everyone gaining awesome public transportation powers and special rules for Guy Fawkes Day. We use incredible intellectual prowess to catch Mr. X effortlessly, and attack him at that point. The battle is a bit more difficult than it seems though, as everyone has to travel there once he is found. Of course, once Wheatie arrives, there is no problem, and he is easily able to burn through all of his 90 psi points, and doing a grand total of 14 damage with really accurate attacks. YEAH! Some other PCs did damage and then got knocked out, so Wheatie crushed Mr. X with a big book (which he was reading since he was so smart after pulling an all-nighter during the battle). Once again, Wheatie saves the day, but is rewarded with a craptacular amount of XP because his mini-objective was not quite complete (clearly because all the mini-objective time got used up before he arrived). Hrm! :(
Note: Special thanks to Wheatie for writing this summary.
Strike Commander Leo
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Police Strike Commander
Leo was once a general with the Deksiilan military, and served in several peacekeeping operations before seeking and receiving an honorable discharge from the army. His retirement was not to last, as crime waves within the city of Cormus spurred him to sign up with the police force. Leo's tactical experience made him an obvious choice to lead the strike team that was sent to eliminate Sarpedon. Leo is a tall, slender man with a strict military bearing and reddish brown hair done in a close brush cut. He typically wears a long blue military coat, flared gloves and polished boots. A long Ziekfierd blade hangs slung across his back, and the worn pommel shows evidence of much use.
Agent Smith
Race: Spheran
Affiliation: The CIA
Agent Smith meets and very much embodies the mould of a standard agent employed by the Coursair Intelligence Agency (CIA). In conformance with the CIA dress code for field agents, Smith is never seen without a black business suit, dark sunglasses and a white earpiece that dangles from one of his slightly pointed ears. Smith was originally part of the cyber crimes unit, where he made his mark tracking down and unplugging hackers and viruses alike. However, his amazing martial arts skills and his competency with matrix multiplication makes him an asset to any strike team.
Borromir
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Police Strike Team
The first thing that anyone would notice about Borromir is that he somehow appears foreign, in a vaguely greasy way, despite being a native of Deksiil. Borromir's family has long labored under the ominous shadow of crime, and its presence has left them susceptible to certain sorts of corruption. Borromir is a large man, with oily blond hair and a goatee. His clothing is mostly sturdy leather, aside from his rather ornate blue bracers. Borromir's equipment is rounded out by his broad sword, circular shield and the horn of Gondor, which he seems tempted to blow at even the slightest provocation. Throughout his service with the police, Borromir has learned to dread bows above all else.
Hamlet
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Police Strike Team
The stage was Hamlet's first calling. He received all the training of classical theater, along with twice the requisite amount of angst. This was only magnified by the appearance of his father's ghost, which was totally unrelated to Hamlet's addiction to several kinds of prescription drugs. Wracked with crippling indecision, Hamlet eventually left the theater and signed up with the police, determined to seek justice for some nebulous wrong committed long ago. While he does know how to fence with his ornate blade, Hamlet is still prone to interminable monologues and gripping indecision. Otherwise, he can be described as an expressive, brooding man with archaic clothing. His mood often matches that of the skull he typically carries.
Irvine
Race: Fenixan
Affiliation: Police Strike Team Sniper
Irvine is a macho Fenixan sniper who cut his teeth in the harsh deserts of Fenixa. Of course, these rough and tumble experiences didn't have any detrimental effects on his rugged good looks. In keeping with his cowboy persona, Irvine typically wears a torn three-piece suit, a beige trenchcoat and a black cowboy hat. His long brown hair is pulled back from his eyes in a loose ponytail, and his sniper rifle is never far from his hands. Irvine has served on several strike teams, and despite a couple allegations of laziness, he remains one of Precinct 12's top snipers.
Saruman
Race: Deksiilan
Affiliation: Sarpedon's CFO
Saruman is a figure who inspires great fear in the financial sector. He serves as Sarpedon's chief financial officer. This has inspired his reputation as something of a wizard of accounting, able to make money trails disappear at an instant's notice. Tall and lean, Saruman's cadaverous frame is typically shrouded in a pure white business suit. This has earned him the title of Saruman The White. His long hair and beard also match this color scheme, and contrast heavily with his dark, cavernous eyes, which seem to smoulder with merciless cruelty.